Disasters, Lovers and Liars;

Renew

2011-03-26T10:00:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone.
Sorry for not blogging anymore.
I am thinking of deleting my blog and creating a new one.
But i will tell you guys my new blog.
I just feel like a new blog.
So, i'll keep you guys updated k?

LOVES! :)

Run This Town

2011-01-15T19:52:00.001-08:00

New school, new friends, new life.

If feels much better than before.
Like it used to feel fake everyday, feel scary everyday and i felt shitty everyday.
Things have changed for me.

I miss you guys :'(
Everything is so different.
None of us talk to each other anymore.
It's almost impossible to talk to you guys.
I miss us.

Everything in my new school is hectic.
Studies, cca, everything.
I barely have time to sleep.
Last night, i went out after what it feels like forever.
It felt great to let loose, be free, eff up.
I needed last night a lot.
But now, it's back to books and uniforms.

This post may not make any sense to you, but it does to me.
New and improved.

LOVES!

Happy New Year :')

2010-12-31T13:11:00.000-08:00

Hello Lovely readers :')

Sorryy i haven't been updating my blog lately. But I assure you, 2011 will be more interesting with more posts and happier posts *crosses fingers* :D

Anyways!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Let us cherish the memories we shared with people here and gone!
Live life to the fullest, no looking back, no regrets!
Make life worth living for and hopefully make no wrong decisions.
2011 is a start to a new year and a new decade!
Make it worth while! :D

For those who finish school, HAVE FUN! GO WILD! LIVE IT UP!
And for those who are less fortunate, like me -.-
Beat school's ASS! Study like there's no tomorrow, study till your eyes drop out of it's sockets!
STUDY UNTIL EVEN YOUR BOOKS CRY! >:D
HAHAH!

Anywaaaays, for those who have been loyal followers, i think you know what i'll be doing next.
For those who are new, it's time for:

NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS! :D

1. Be in more plays, movie, dramas etc.
2. Get even closer to my family, friends and boyfriend :)
3. To spend another new years with Bryan Chung :')
4. Study harder and achieve my life long dreams.
5. Work EVEN HARDER towards AADA :)
6. Take up a new interest beside cheerleading.
7. Better myself in every perspective.
8. Stay positive even in the most negative situations!
9. Get a better understanding of life and religions.

10. KICK 2011'S BIG FAT ASS! >:D

HAHAH! Okay now that's over, we all know i love to reminisce sooo, these are just a few things i'll miss from 2010 :')

- Performing at Cheer 2010 under Charm All Stars :')
- Getting much muuuucchhh closer to Leysha, Mama and Papa :')
- Finding a love like Bryan Chung <3
- Keeping a 5 year friendship with Jelissa Jasmene.
- Surviving PMR and actually doing better than i thought. 2a's 3b's and 3c's :')
- Mencari Jannah with Sofi Jikan :) Not only did we find Jannah, we also found a little bit of Sharifah Aryana i sort of kind of lost for awhile and i got to do what most people have on their "To Do Before I Die List" :D
- Natrah the play with Aunty Eirma Fatima! The best first experience anyone would DIE to ever have gotten!
- Meeting new people and learning about them.
- Finding out who i can and cannot trust.
- Buying myself my very own phone with my very own hard earned money :')
- Having fun, letting go and feeling a little piece of freedom after PMR :)
- Growing up and understanding ways to cope with life and learn to stay strong and how to center myself into becoming a young lady.
- Anugerah Skrin with Mama, Kak Leysha, Kak Nani and Kak Leya :') Kak Nani won, Muallaf won and not to mention Mak Won :')

That's about it i guess :D Aren't you all glad this was a suuuuper loooonggg possttt? :D
If you want to ask anything, my formspring awaits;

www.formspring.me/yanalyahya

But until then, this is the end of this post.
Goodnight everybody and again, Happy New Year 2011!

LOVES!

And So My Goals Were Set

2010-11-09T07:08:00.001-08:00

So lovely dearest,

We have been there for each other for 4 months.

You never fail to make me smile. It's incredible.

With you, i feel a thousand smiles and warmness.

I love you, sunshine. You are number one, Bryan :)

Happy 4th Month, baby <3

Anyways,

Sorry, scollywogs! I have been on the set of Mencari Jannah soon to air on Astro Oasis.

I was soooo busy i didn't have time to on my laptop let alone type something and for that, please accept my humblest of apologies.

I'll soon update when it'll be shown.

It was one of the best shoot i have ever been on and one of the most challenging characters to portray so i do hope you watch and tell me whether you like it or not and if you do have anything to ask, my formspring awaits.

How am i you ask?

Well tired, VERY TIRED! But i'm doing fine. Bryan and i have been together for 4 months now and we still haven't had a fight. Wow! :D

He's still sweet and we still are very much in love *blushes*

The last post however, wasn't too good :(
I'm sorry you all had to see that but i had to let it out.

You see, a few boys in my school find it so hard to leave me alone therefore they have to irritate every nerve in my body in order to go on in life.

So when they get on my nerves, i blog about it.

Don't worry, i'm fine.

They just love making me feel like crap.

Shallow minded opposites. That's what they are. Bullies.

I'll be okay. I just really hate their guts, is all -.-

I'll blog again soon k?

LOVES!

Anticipation

2010-11-06T23:56:00.000-07:00

I have been working, dear readers.

But i am back.

Anticipation is well hated by many but hold on to your pants.

A little while more and i'll update something better.

For now my thoughts are oozing out.

No, i do not think i'm better than you although you show very well that i am.

No, i did not start the fight because everyone can see you did.

No, i do not want to fight because you are a useless waste of space and it'll be a sin to waste time on you.

No, i don't want to be your friend because you deserve hell not heaven.

But.

Yes, i want this to end because it's so embarrassing.

Yes, i do think you are stupid, immature and shallow minded.

Yes, i would LOVE it if you keep your big fat nose out of things you don't understand.

Yes, i would very much appreciate it if you just leave me alone.

Don't forget who i am and what i can do.

Don't forget i was your friend therefore i know so many secrets of yours.

If only i was as disgusting and as moronic and i had no morals like you, your secrets wouldn't be secrets anymore.

Watch your back, cause i'm still waiting for redemption.

LOVES!

Death Is Most Definitely Less Certain Than Life

2010-09-30T09:39:00.000-07:00

So as most of you have heard, a girl in my school passed away.

She was popular, cute and she always had a smile on her face.

I didn't know her personally but i have had several encounters with her.

Not only did she pass away so soon in life, she also did it fast.

She was only 16.

She slept and never woke up.

Leaving everything and everyone is questions.

I'm so sorry for her family and friends seeing she was a big impact on their lives.

She will be missed, definitely.

Times like this is when you start embracing the feelings you feel.

You feel thankful about what you have and suddenly it all feels as though time is really what we have.

You can't help thinking "What if I die tomorrow?"

I have been thinking of what'll happen if i die tomorrow and it all seems so hard.

I have so many things i still want to do, so many people i still want to see.

I have so many secrets to make, so many hearts to break.

It all seem so far away, death.

But is it really?

I can't help but be sentimental.

R.I.P, Ng Zhi Qi.

The Day Doesn't Begin Before Your Smile

2010-09-30T09:36:00.001-07:00

HAHA. I love you :)

Day 3 - Your Parents :)

2010-09-30T09:21:00.000-07:00

Dear Father and Mother,

I know i rarely say it but i thank god everyday that i have you both as my parents. Not only are the both of you mentally challenged, psychotic and you have moodswings all the time but you guys are also always there when i need you, loving, caring, supportive, funny, cool and basicly amazing!

Ma,

You never fail to make me believe in who i am and who i portray. You give me the gift of voice and freedom and you never judge me or not trust me. You have made me a better person inside and out from the first time you ever touched me. You're like my bestfriend and my mom. When i'm sad i know you can cheer me up and when i'm happy, it's usually because of you. I know i make you sad sometimes and i have done my share of disappointing acts but you out of all people have thought me that a human being will always do wrong to finally figure out the right. I love you so much, Ma. Thank you for being the strong, loving, huggable mother i need and love. You have and will always be my idol :)

Pa,

Your wisdom and courage can shatter glass and break buildings made of steel. You give me the support and advice i need to carry on. You make me laugh when i feel like dying and kill me when i think i'm giving up. You always thought me to never obey anyone i think is wrong and you have no idea how much it has helped me. You're always the strong loving father i can go to for anything. You always give me exactly what i need. You make life feel better when it's going down in flames. You are the best father anyone could be lucky to get. You make me the strong-hearted girl i am today. I bet i couldn't go a mile if you're gone. You are the best and i can't even imagine losing you. I love you so much, Pa and even if your ego doesn't let you show it, but i know you love me too. :)

That's a lot of bolds :O

2010-09-28T10:51:00.000-07:00

Bold what applies to you.

My personality:
I’m loud.
I’m obnoxious.
I’m sarcastic.
I’m cocky.
I cry easily.
I have bad temper.
For the most part I don’t like people.
I’m easy to get along with.
I have more enemies than friends.
I’ve smoked.
I’ve smoked weed.
I drink coffee.
I clean my room daily.

My appearance:
I wear makeup.
I wear a piece of jewellery at all times.
I wear contacts.
I wear glasses.
I have braces.
I change my hair colour often.
I straighten my hair often.
I have a piercing.
I have small feet.

Relationships:
I’m in a relationship now.
I'm single.
I’m crushin’.
I’ve missed an ex before.
An ex has physically abused me at least once.
I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.
I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.
I’ve been in love more than two times.
I believe in love at first sight.
I believe lust is more important than love.

Friendships:
I have a best friend.
I have at least ten friends.
I’ve gotten a phone call in the last 48 hours from a friend.
I’ve beaten up a friend.
I’ve been in a serious fight with a friend.
I can trust at least five people with my life.

Experiences:
I’ve been on a plane.
I’ve been on a train
Someone close to me has died.
I’ve taken a taxi.
I’ve taken a city bus.
I’ve taken a school bus.
I’ve gone bungee jumping.
I’ve made a speech.
I’ve been in some sort of club.
I’ve won an award.
I’ve spent 24 hours on the computer straight.
I’ve been in a physical fight.

Music:
I listen to R&B.
I listen to country.
I listen to pop.
I listen to techno.
I listen to rock.
I’m one of those people who play songs repeatedly until I hate it.
I hate the radio.
I download music.
I buy CD’s.

Television:
I spend at least six hours a day watching television.
I watch soap operas daily.
I’m in love with Days Of Our Lives.
I've seen and liked the O.C.
I've seen and liked One Tree Hill.
I've seen and liked Popular.
I've seen and liked 24.
I’ve seen and liked CSI.
I've seen and liked Everwood.

Hair:
I've been brown.
I’ve had streaks.
I’ve cut my hair in the past year.
I’ve dyed my hair in the past year.
I’ve been blonde.
I’ve had black.
I’ve been red.
I've been light brown.
I’ve been medium brown.
I’ve been blue/green.
I’ve had my hair thinned.
I use conditioner.
I’ve used silk therapy.
I’ve used hot oil treatments.
I’ve curled my hair.
I’ve straightened my hair
I’ve braided my hair.

School:
I’ve yelled at a teacher.
I’ve been suspended.
I’ve had an in-school suspension.
I’ve been sent to the principal’s office.
I’ve walked out of class.
I’ve skipped an entire day of school.
I’ve skipped a whole month of one certain class.
I’ve failed Art.
I’ve failed P.E.
I’ve failed math.
I’ve failed science.
I’ve failed another class.
A teacher has called my parents.

Day 2 - Your Crush

2010-09-15T14:21:00.001-07:00

Dear Bryan,

I barely call you a crush. You're my boyfriend -.- Oh well. You are the best thing i could ever wish for. You exceed my expectations EVERYDAY! You always make me laugh without fail. You're like my bestfriend and boyfriend jammed into one. We have our equal likes and dislikes but we manage to make then work. You keep things fresh and alive and i love you for that. You have sacrificed a lot for me and i plan on doing the same. Your compliments are never too much or too little.

We can talk about absolutely anything and stay so comfortable with each other. I love you and i may not show it or i may show it too much but i don't care. I would write "I LOVE YOU" all over KLCC if i needed to. Your perfect blend of romance, trust, charm, sexyness and love make you so addictive.

Thank you, baby. For turning my life upside down and for letting me in so deep into your heart.

I love you.

Day 1 - Your Bestfriend :)

2010-09-15T14:13:00.000-07:00

Dear JDM,

You girls have been the best girls any girl can wish for. You make me want to pull out my hair with anger, scream at the top of my lungs and jump off a cliff but that's what makes us what we are today :) We have had our ups and downs -.- Trust me but i wouldn't take anything back if i could.

Dear J,

We have been bestest best friends for a looohooonnngggg time. We fought way too many times and made up even more :D You're like my twin. The total opposite of me but we have a connection like no other. My best friend, enemy and sister from another mother. Your family is love and i love you so much. If you can't see it enough, imma punch you -.-

Dear D,

You haven't been in my life for that long but the short time you have been, has been amazing :D We laugh at the most random things and we don't give a shit. Your like my stoner friend i never had. Hot, amazing and funny. What more can i ask for? I love you, stoner :D

Dear M,

You broke my heart so many times but i don't blame you. No matter what and no matter who, you'll always be the one i can always go to and depend on. You make me laugh even when i'm at my breaking point. The gossip lover, fashion designer, muti-tasker bestfriend. We had our differences but i don't care cause without them, we wouldn't be us. You are like the sister i always wanted. I may not admit it much, but i miss you and i hope that i can open my heart to you again. Although i don't admit it, but you're still my bestfriend and i still love you :')

Taken from Jolene Lee Pei Wen :)

2010-09-15T14:10:00.000-07:00

Day 1 — Your best friend

Day 2 — Your crush

Day 3 — Your parents

Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)

Day 5 — Your dreams

Day 6 — A stranger

Day 7 — Your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend

Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet

Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

Day 11 — A deceased person you wish you could talk to

Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you

Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from

Day 15 — The person you miss the most

Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country

Day 17 — Someone from your childhood

Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be

Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest

Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression

Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to

Day 23 — The last person you kissed

Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory

Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times

Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to

Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day

Day 28 — Someone that changed your life

Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

And now, it starts.

Selamat Hari Raya!

2010-09-09T01:35:00.000-07:00

The time has come for my sins to be forgiven and for me to forgive!

Let's admit, we can't wait for this month usually for the money, the food and get togethers.

I agree a hundred percent that is exactly what i look forward to :D

So, I, Sharifah Aryana, would like to minta maaf if i have ever done any wrong to hurt your feeling or you :)

Selamat Hari Raya Maaf Zahir & Batin :)

LOVES!

Conversation Corner

2010-09-03T12:56:00.001-07:00

A few days ago, i was clearing out my laptop out of things i didn't need or want to see anymore. I realized how much of it i barely see now.

Most of you don't know that i write a lot. Maybe i don't blog as much but i do write. Every time i can't sleep or if something pops out onto my mind, i write it down or type it down. Basically, i'm saying i had to delete a lot of memories in the process of cleaning out my laptop. Things like letters and emotions gone with a simple delete.

I did though, come across a conversation i saved. It was between me and a friend. This friend of mine were really close but that was way back when. Now, we're barely acquainted. Even when we meet, it's like we have never even met before. I mean i'm pretty sure he isn't even reading this but i think even is he is, he wouldn't know it's about him. Scary. That's how far apart we are now.

Well, Friend, i just want to say coming across the conversation honestly brought tears to my eyes. I had a rush of emotions and it came all of a sudden. It hurts me to know and to have to force myself to accept the fact you are no longer there for me anymore. Don't get me wrong, neither am i but i do want to be. You were a sweet boy, loyal, honest, loving and very much loved by me and everyone around you but you had to follow the wrong roads and now, i can barely have a conversation with you without you having to go back to your drugs. Even if we talk, it's about your drugs. I'm not saying i hate you for doing that but i do hate you for leaving. Things couldn't have stayed the same i know and i get it but you could at least remember a thing or two about what we had.

These kind of discoveries bring me to tears and frankly, i have to admit while biting my lips, deep down in this very annoyed and broken heart that i actually do kinda sorta miss you :/

Remember when i hugged you so tight when she left you cause that's all you needed and when you wrote that short letter in his iPod and we read it together and changed it? When nobody was there for you and they were there for her, i was there for you, making sure you were at your best. I hugged you as you cried and i told you everything was going to be alright? I miss you. Just try and remember to miss me once in awhile kay? I'm not asking for more.

Until the next time,

LOVES!

Cherry Bomb

2010-08-25T22:37:00.000-07:00

For my 200th post, i promised myself to blog about one thing that makes me happy at the moment.

Right at this moment, Bryan Chung Chen Yin makes me happy. But he won't be happy if he knew i posted his full name here. HAHA!

I love you, Baby :)

My one and only.

Heart You

2010-08-25T08:06:00.000-07:00

So baby,

Don't expect a goodbye.

2010-08-25T02:05:00.000-07:00

We can see each other on a daily basis with school and all. Not all bad la sayang. PMR is not that far away. It's going to be September soon. And then you'll be left with a month to study. After that, you can do lotsa shit. For now, listen to your parents lah. I wanna spend time with you too, but there's things you can't force right? I'll wait for you after PMR <3

I love you and i just can't freaking wait :(

Rumbling and Tumbling

2010-08-25T02:02:00.001-07:00

It's funny cause the only person that cares, isn't here with me.

Far away

2010-08-25T01:48:00.000-07:00

One day,

I'll pull myself out of this mess and leave.

One day,

I'll clean myself up out of this mess i've created unconsciously.

One day,

I'll make something of this crap i call a life.

One day,

I wouldn't have to cry myself to sleep.

One day,

We'll run away and never look back.

One day,

We can tell our children the things we had to go through.

One day,

I'll punch you in the face and you didn't even see it coming.

One day,

My tears would so much to you.

One day,

You'll snap out and make an effing decision for once.

One day,

You will leave me alone because you've finally accepted the fact i'm better than you.

One day,

I wouldn't have to worry about you anymore because god will kill you and stop me from having to do it.

One day,

People who see what you are and realize what i am.

One day,

I will go through a day without trying to die.

One day,

I wouldn't have to make amends with myself every night.

One day,

You'll all believe me and what i say.

One day,

I'll be someone and have many things. But i won't do it here nor near here.

I'll make something of myself far away. Far far away from here.

and that One day,

You'd wish you hadn't left me in the first place.

Jealousy

2010-08-23T02:06:00.001-07:00

Bryan,

I wanted so bad not to post a post bout you but i can't help it.

I want the world to know how great you are and how much i love you.

So, here it is, very short but sweet.

I love you, honey and you mean the world to me.

Whatever whoever says, i love YOU and you are special to me.

May our lives be full of endless haters and threats and how we'll get pass it together.

I love you, gorgeous and no one shall tell you otherwise :)

LOVES!

Memories

2010-08-21T09:43:00.000-07:00

So the past few days have been moving slowly.

It's okay i guess but it leaves things content.

Had a nice dinner with the boyfriend.

Adruce and Farah were supposed to join us :/ oh well.

I cook for Bryan and he seemed happy and overfed.

Anyways, the bestfriend is still out of sight and it hurts me knowing she really doesn't care.

For someone who was always there, her leaving really left a hole in my heart.

But that's exactly what you get when you let your heart win. Haihh.

Let's just hope she's human enough to not spill all my secrets.

I still trust her even though i know it's a risky thing to do.

Changing of topic, just now, Bryan and i were lepaking after eating and i was talking about my late grandfather.

In a matter of minutes, tears started forming in my under lids.

Bryan realized and therefore i stopped.

I still miss you, Tok :(

I'm going to Penang for a week.

I just cannot wait.

It seems to be the best thing to do right now.

Not only that, the cousins are going too.

This may be the best opportunity to recompound.

My heart needs mending and what better way then family reunions, right?

Let's hope this doesn't turn into a shitfest.

LOVES!

Bestfriend,

2010-08-17T23:06:00.000-07:00

You lost my trust and broke my heart in exactly less than 5 minutes.

I want nothing to do with you anymore.

You're a stranger to me.

I hope you're happy with whoever you chose to be friends with.

Oh and Happy Effing Birthday

I miss you ;

2010-08-11T10:32:00.000-07:00

Ramadhan has begun and all i feel is reminiscent. Sahur is out of the question. I'm not looking forward to Raya. My heart sinks everything i think about Raya and i frankly have no hope on making this Raya a memorable one. It used to be about Meeting the grandparents but i don't think Tok Aling is looking forward to Raya too. I cry sometimes trying to remember how the last Raya i spent with him was. It's such a blur memory just too shady to remember. It breaks my heart into pieces. Well at least we can Raya in heaven one day to come. I just really miss you, Tok and knowing that right now in the month of Ramadhan, that your a little bit closer to me than usual just kills me inside cause i can feel your presence when i'm alone but i can't hear nor see you anymore. I had a dream and it felt so real, i felt as though waking up was a sin. Waking up was like leaving you but i know you'll come back to me in my dreams and i'll be waiting for you.

To the man that never made me sad, Abu Bakar bin Mohd Noor.

Bliss

2010-08-07T15:51:00.000-07:00

I've been addicted to Chase Coy. Heard him from Alisya's blog. He is amazing with serenades. He throws in sweet yet smart and witty lines. I love it :)

So as you all know, i have a new boyfriend, Bryan, and how much i've been bragging bout him and telling everyone in the whole world how great he is and how happy i am. Blablabla.

I just wanna clarify to the cbox anons, i SAID those things bout Harith yeah true cause at that time, he made me feel that way. I mean if you haven't noticed, i write what i feel or think at that particular moment. So yeah i said that about Harith cause he made me feel good. I emphasize on MADE. Harith is my past. He is a big part of my past, i admit but he is my PAST and now i'm in present and Bryan is present. He is here now. He is here with me, NOW! So why should i waste my time remembering the past when i have an amazing present? You get me? I'm not angry. I'm just explaining. Kayh?

So anyways, PMR is coming soon :'( I swear to god i have the will power of a bulldog. Everytime i want to study, i get distracted and annoyed. Then i start feeling stupid then i stop. *sigh* If only i had more will power to push myself further. For now, my main priority is my studies. I keep wanting to do good but i'm so weak. *sigh* Pray for me, readers -.- i need more will power.

I need topics to blog about. My brain is BLANK! :(

LOVES!

Giggity :)

2010-08-04T10:11:00.000-07:00

For starters, i have been through a whole lot of shit. I have been in so many crap relationships with so many shit exes. So i want you to know how happy i am that you are nowhere near what i had. You make going to school fun. You make watching scary movies exciting. You make the shittiest of days the best and you don't even need to try. You and me have an amazing understanding like no other. We've had our ups and downs but i will go through a whole lifetime of downs just for one up and it all won't matter just as long as i'm with you. This past month has been a crazy emotional roller coaster but you seem to be handling it wonderfully.

Let's admit i'm not an easy girl to be with. Emotionally, mentally and physically. My mood swings, my free-living, my not-so-funny-hurtful jokes, my mean mouth and my pussy punches. I'm complexed and it makes you a tad bit insecure and scared i might do something stupid to hurt you but baby, i'm pretty sure i'm here to stay. Don't worry. You are sweet, charming, undeniably sexy, funny and you make me feel warm and mushy inside. You are like a dream and i still think one of these days imma wake up and cry my eyeballs out. I'm so lucky to have ever won your heart. I don't exactly know how but i'm happy i did.

I know you hate reading my blog

especially when it's suuuperrr loooonnnggggggg so i'm cutting it short with a

Happy One Month Anniversary and I love you, Bryan :)

With all the holes in my heart.

LOVES!

Life As We Know It :)

2010-07-25T07:50:00.000-07:00

I almost feel 9 again. Listening to Fallout Boy while playing solitaire. Thinking of who and where I’ll be in 10 years time. What kind of person will I morph into. What kind of music I’ll be listening to then. What kind of people and personalities I’ll surround myself with. What kind of boys I’ll be dating. What I’ll do as a career. What’ll be my last purpose on this earth.

I can say in that area, I haven’t changed too much. I still do think about all the things I have thought about since I was 9. But now, I have filled in the blanks with sheer dreams. I may still not know exactly what I want to do but at least I have a blurry vision of what I think will make me happy and that is certainly the only thing I’m sure I want to be.

So while I listen to Fallout Boy again but this time at the age of 15, I think back to the times I was wondering where I wanted to be and now knowing I just want simplicity makes me feel a little content with the way my life is rolling on.

I want to Major in Performing Arts and Minor in Business. I want to make my family proud and make the tears, sweat and hard work worth it. I’ll make something out of myself people will die to meet. I’ll make myself something bigger than my dreams. I’ll do this all with a smile on my face. Okay let’s be realistic. Times will get hard and maybe I won’t have a smile on my face forever, but I vow to be content and grateful for everything that’ll ever happen. Things will be worth it. Things will be fine.

As for my last purpose on earth, I want to move people with how I am. I want to be remembered as a wonderful person. Not necessarily to a lot of people but moving even one person or touching someone’s heart will make my life done. It’ll complete me. It’ll give me a sense of confidence to go on in the afterlife. I may sound crazy but the feeling I get when someone really remembers me as something big that ever happened in their life, it just makes me feel so indescribable. It’ll be enough to give me the strength to go through heaven and hell. Simple.

LOVES!

So Take Your Gloves and Get Out While You Can;

2010-07-20T05:29:00.000-07:00

I realized i've been busy lately.

To busy to blog.

So since i have this few hours until someone calls me, i shall blog.

So lately, i have been focusing on my dreams.

I made up my mind to do Performing Arts.

Cause i rather do performing arts than psychology but that doesn't mean i love it any less.

So knowing i'm going to do performing arts, i have been focusing on Cheer and High School Musical.

Which reminds me :)

My team, from SMK Bandar Sri Damansara 1, won best theme.

Not only that, we're going to be on Camp Rock 2!

Just clips but still!

Thats massive! HAHA!
I feel so proud of my team <3

Anyways, other than my dreams, i have been busy studying for PMR :D

I know i know, PMR is less than 2 months away.

Trust me, i'm freaking out.

But i dont know. I guess i have to focus on my dreams too.

I have been lepaking with Bryan almost everyday now.

I am addicted -.-

It's annoying. HAHA!

Mama and Papa seem to be quite fond of him.

Thank god :D

Sorry i haven't been blogging.

To all the readers that have been loyal, thank you :)

I shall start blogging more often okay?

Stay tuned, lovers <3

LOVES!

Smother Me ;

2010-07-19T05:19:00.000-07:00

This is Bryan Chung :)

He makes me laugh all the time.

He makes my heart beat fast but at the same time, calms me down.

We have too many things in common.

It comes across weird sometimes.

But i like it.

I love the way he smiles and looks at me.
He makes me feel so special.

He is so sweet and he takes very good care of me.

Best of all?

He's my boyfriend :D

Arent i lucky? ;)

Sayang,

2010-07-03T11:52:00.001-07:00

Oh, and i love it when you call me baby <3

Art Comes In Many Forms;

2010-07-03T11:16:00.001-07:00

And So I'll Live for Today

2010-07-03T11:12:00.000-07:00

Melayu Boy :)

2010-07-03T10:51:00.000-07:00

You make me happy <3

Misters and Misses ;

2010-07-03T10:43:00.000-07:00

One of the things i enjoy most of life is mistakes.

The loads of trouble you get in.

And it only took one second to make that decision.

You see, life has a way of specially caressing you into its surreptitious arms and when you feel comfortable, it crushed you and you turn into nothing but dust.

Love, life, death.

Three simple steps to the next life.

I heard a quote saying

"Where we are, where we live, what we do.

It isn't home.

We are on a bus going home."

So why are we so afraid to live life and die?

Another quote i heard was something like,

"Death, it's peaceful easy,

much easier then living."

Don't you feel better already?

I don't know about all of you, but i'm sure as hell i'm ready to go home.

Don't get me wrong, i love my "temporary" life.

I am very happy.

But there is a "home sweet home"

Hold On To Me Tight ;

2010-06-16T11:47:00.000-07:00

I'm in my bed listening to the sweet serenades of Michael Buble.

So have all of you realize that i haven't been blogging enough lately?

Answer? Lost of inspiration.

Nothing is right now.

Everything is different.

Everything is gone.

So tell me.

What could i possibly start blogging about when there is nothing?

I have given up on everything.

I could just sleep all day and cry all night.

Loves!

A Friend In Need Is A Friend In Deed ;

2010-06-15T09:20:00.000-07:00

You know how they say friends are like the stars?

There not there ALL the time, but you know they are there.

Jelissa Jasmene,

You have no idea how much i thank god for gracing me with your presence. You've not only brought me up from the dead, you made me a whole new beautiful person inside and out. You always know what to say and nothing can make you change your ways. You have a wonderful personality and you're wit and charm is indescribable. You make me happy all the time and when i'm not it's because we're not together. We had our amazing differences in the past and thank god that we passed that and grew up together. The fights and misunderstandings we have ever had just blossomed into an unforgettable friendship. I will bring our memories to my grave and all the way up to heaven and share it with everyone there. You are the bestfriend every girl wants and i'm so lucky to have you as mine. Nothing and no one can ever change this amazing bond we have. Cause sayang, we can rule he world together. Stay with me for another five years k? I can't even begin to say in words how much i love you, so imma just say it and hope you understand and believe how much i do. Jeja, i love you :) Always had, always will, bestie <3

Nothing's Bigger Than Love ;

2010-06-10T01:32:00.000-07:00

And so i leap and i fell.

And so i have felt the pain and gone through the broken bones.

And so i have never felt so much pain before in my life.

And even if the after math is life shattering and heart breaking,

I would do it all over again if it were to bring me even the slightest closer to you.

I Wanna Be There For You ;

2010-06-05T08:16:00.000-07:00

This post goes out to the three girls that has never let me down.

The three girls i can't live without.

And the three girls i can be exactly who i am with under any conditions.

The girls who picked me up when i was broken,

Who melted my heart when it was frozen.

Through any kind of heartbreak and pain,

These girls picked me up and through the rain.

If ever one day, we'll have to apart,

The memories we shared will never be forgot.

Mell, Dinie and Jeja?

Please know that whenever you feel that i am distant,

it doesn't mean i don't love you all.

It means i need time to heal.

And thank you for letting me do so and for being there when i was done.

You guys are the best and i love you <3

Somebody To Love ;

2010-06-02T05:41:00.000-07:00

Dear Reader,

Im sorry i haven't been posting anything up lately. Alot has changed since my last post :) My grandfather, Abu Bakar bin Mohd Noor breathed his last breath on 26th of May. Around 2.20am, i was awaken by my very content sister, Kak Leya, saying he had a flat line. We got ready and headed to the hospital. We reached there and he was already being moved to the morgue. Yes, the morgue. We went home for we had no more business there and got ready for the pekebumian. Everything happened so fast, the next thing i knew i was at his tahlil. So yeah :) I'm sorry for the last post. I am fine, so is my family. We're taking this better than all of us thought. Thank you for those you sent your condolences and keep praying for his well-being wherever he is, okay?

Amin :)

You Roll Out Of Bed And Down On Your Knees;

2010-05-24T11:22:00.000-07:00

The best thing she does is hide her pain.

She can't cry cause she's out of tears.

She can't scream cause she's exhausted.

And she can't run away cause it isn't a dream.

Hey readers!

Haven't had time to blog :/

I know, i'm sorry!

I tried finding time but you know how i am.

I'm constantly up and running.

Whether i like it or not -.-

So anyways, a lot has happened.

1. My grandfather is very ill.

2. My exams are coming.

3. I was on AF. (shocking)

4. Went to Tutti Frutti with my girls :)

5. Slept over at the hospital.

6. Celebrated dear daddy's boirthday :D

Let me elaborate?

Point #1 ;

Abu Bakar bin Mohd Noor, my grandfather, is currently at a hospital right now.

He is very ill and he can barely talk.

He can't communicate and that frustrates him.

He's in a lot of pain but he can't tell us where.

He can't talk.

He has been bed ridden for a while now.

Point #2 ;

My exams are starting next week.

I can barely focus on anything.

My mind is all over the place.

I have been studying and i hope it's all worth it.

My grades can not go down!
It's a matter of life and death, i tell you!

I'm focusing on school then make my way through.

Point #3 ;

I know i know it's funny but i did it to help Daus.

It's basically a small sketch cause neither Kak Nani or Diana Danielle could make it.

It was so last minute and it was fun working with him :)

He was so fun and he contributed a lot of ideas.

He is so much more comel in person, i must admit.

It was cool being on stage and everyone watching.

I felt the rush of adrenaline.

I loved it >:)

Point #4 ;

Okay point number 4 was funny.

It was so spontaneous and unplanned.

After school, we just hopped on a taxi and went.

Dinie, Jeja, Mell and I.

Just us four girls.

It was a total girl gossip session.
We talked and talked and even got a picture of the four of us.

(finally!)

We ate so much!

Just the four of us costs about RM 98.

I know! HAHAHAH!
Crazy right?

But every single drop was worth it.

For me la.

The girls thought it was okay.

Massive rawr moment >:)

Point #5 ;

Seeing that Tok Wan was sick and i haven't seen my cousins in like ages, I made a spontaneous decision to sleep over at the hospital a few days back.

It was so fun but exhausting!

We had major cousin bonding sessions :)

I love my cousins la.

I don't know why but they could always cheer me up.

It was the four of us.

Tasha, Anis, Amirul and I :)

Leysha wasn't there though.

She had plans that night.

Though she missed out on a whole lot of fun, she had her fun too.

Oh that reminds me, HAPPY BIRTHDAY VINODA GANASE!

Sorry i couldn't be there :)

I know for a fact you had a good time, eyh? ;D

So anyways, we stayed up to about 7am then all three of us excluding Anis konged out.

Atleast we had a nice time taking care of Tok Wan :)

And i already have an awesome memory of Tok Wan that night.

Hehe.

Point #6 ;

As of today, well yesterday now, my daddy, Syed Zainal Rashid has turned 56!

Hahaha!

He will kill me if he found out i blogged his age.

Papa, you are the best father ever and I'm not just saying that.

You are like a best-friend, a mentor, a crazy lunatic and an amazing father roll in one.

My life will never be complete without you.

Im blessed to be able to call you my dad.

Oh oh! Guess what we bought for him?

See you all don't know this but my dad is a geek!

A total action figure collecting geek!

Hahaha!

He loves memorabilias so we bought him his favourite robot.

Megatron!

HAHAHA!

It was a limited edition collectors item Megatron.

It's because eventhough Leysha and I love the Autobots, he LOVES the Decepticons.

I know some of ya'll won't know what i'm talking bout and that's because no one understands how much Transformers means to us.

HAHAHAH!

Okay so i guess that it.

Oh but before i go, is anyone coming for C3?

Charm Cheerleading Championship?

It's going to be at OU and if ya'll wanna hang out with me, imma be there, alright?

Im going to be helping out under charm :D

So yeahh, see you there!

LOVES!

Persephone Herself ;)

2010-05-10T09:22:00.000-07:00

Help! Help! Her wrists are bleeding,

She can feel her head throbbing,

Her nose dripping,

Her lower back snapping,

Her legs ripping,

She feels the pain,

Oh boy! She's suffering,

She needs a hug, medication or something!

To ease the pain and let her go,

From all the secrets even she doesn't know.

Hey there people!

Sorry for not following up.

You all might be thinking, what happened to the guy and the letter?

Now that's one secret i'll never tell.

HAHAHA!

Been spending loads of time with Dinie recently.

Like just last weekend she slept over for two nights.

Awesome? Pretty much.

So last Saturday i went to Leysha's Electric Showcase.

It was down-right fun!

Music was fantastic.

I realize there was a lot of blues going around.

Music wise i mean.

Twas awesome!

OH OH!

Leysha, Tana and Lee performed Anna Molly (javadee), I wanna hold your hand and Landslide.

So good!

I was soo proud :D

After the gig, we went to Hartamas until god knows what time, lepaked and went home to spend the whole night, wait i mean, morning staying up listening to music and all.

HAHAHAH!

It was a fun night.

Then on Sunday, i woke up with a headache and backache to watch

COPELAND!!

Copeland may be one of my favourite-est bands right now.

Their lyrics, their music, their vocals, sound arrangement.

EVERYTHING! is absolutely flawless :')

But because of the very bad organiser "FirstTance" (have ya'll heard of them?) I, SHARIFAH ARYANA!, missed the WHOLE show!

They said it was starting at 8.

When i went there, they were performing their encores :'(

WHAT THE FACK RIGHT?!

I was so angry so Farah talked to the people in-charge and they got us front of the meet and greet line.

Better yet?

I GOT HUGS FROM THE WHOLE BAND!
*screams*

Like they ALL gave me a hug.

Cause i told them i missed everything and they were so sympathetic.

Goshh! I love them so much *wipes tears*

And and aaaannnddd! I got an autograph tee for My Main Man, Joey Khong!

Mhmm, ya'll bitchas get mean! HAHAHAHAHA

*clears throat*

Anyywaaayysss, i will upload the pictures soon! :D

Then just now, after school, Mell, Dinie and I lepaked at my house the whole day!

HAHAH!

We were later joined by Syamil and Armand but yeahh.

We had our special girl time before they came.

Special special indeed :)

Want pictures? SURE!

Hahaha! Nice, right? :D

K then, bye!

LOVES!

She's Nothing In Comparison

2010-05-03T00:26:00.000-07:00

She hasn't slept in a week.

She looks pale and weak.

Will anything stop this girl?

No. Cause she's living in her own world.

I gave him the letter.

Boy, was it hard :/

Let's just hope everything will be fine.

I'm feeling hopeful.

I'm feeling optimistic.

This May Be Too Much For You To Know But,

2010-05-02T10:53:00.000-07:00

In Which She Gave Up On Everything But Him;

2010-05-02T05:14:00.001-07:00

She took all his promises to her grave.

Took all his lies throughout her life.

Hoped for everything that never cam true.

Till the day she died,

she was hoping for someone to be exactly like you.

Hello!

Lately my brain has been on Auto-pilot.

I'm a walking talking zombie.

No heart, no emotions, no point in life.

Hope is what i have i wont let it go.

I'm in need of justification, truth and down-right loving.

I have this letter you see and it's addressed to this guy i like.

And i have never loved anyone as much as i do with him.

He makes me feel so good and everything he does, means the world to me.

I haven't sent it as i am still contemplating on whether i shall send it or burn it.

So many pros and cons to this situation.

My brain is literally exhausted to even make a decision.

But as a quote i have strongly held on to, said by a friend of mine, Dinie Zikri,

"FUCK IT"

Best quote ever.

It simply means.
Don't give a fuck, just fuck whatever the fuck comes your way the fucking way you wanna fucking do it.

Amazing right?

Two words complete a whole fucking sentence?

Sorry, mind my French.

Anyways, may i continue my last thought?

So this letter holds my most inner deepest feelings and i wrote it when i'm thinking best.

At 6.30 in the morning.

I wrote that letter after missing him one day.

So i wrote down EXACTLY what i was feeling.

Now dear readers. Anyone, anywhere.

SHOULD I GIVE IT TO HIM?

Birthday Girl says huh.

2010-04-21T09:09:00.000-07:00

"She applauded his sincerity.

Made him cry and want her.

Made him forget the meaning of life.

Ignored the whole reason of existence.

She slowly made him feel

like he was on top of the world,

and at that very moment, she leaves."

SO! I celebrated my 15th birthday today :)

Everything was hectic but awesome! Im so tired right now!

I celebrated with my Suzuran Family ;)

Mell, Dinie, Syamil, Ezzat, Hamzah, Ariell, Zul, Reece, and Syafiq.

We went to Mcd and just had fun.

My whole day started with;

Leysha hitting me, screaming at the top of her lungs "WAKE UP LAH, GEMUK!"

I slowly got up and made my way to the toilet.

Got ready and headed to school.

At school the first thing i heard was someone screaming my name.

I turned around and it was Belle.

She yelled "Happy Birthday, Yana!"

I smiled, thanked her and made my way.

Let's just say today was filled with hugs and birthday wished.

Today made me feel love. In some freaky unexplainable way -.-

So yeah.

Walked up the stairs and Mell was the first to give me her present.

She made me open it then and there.

I open her carefully decorated box and there, a golden bracelet laid.

It was so pretty and it instantly became my favourite accessory.

After that, we made our way up to class.

Saw Ezzat, Dinie and the gang.

Ezzat then gave me HIS present.

In a nice gift bag :) So sweet.

Walked into class and my chinese family screamed "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YANA!"

That made me smile of course.

Put my bag down and rushed to Agama class next door where my Suzuran family was waiting.

They all took turns to hug and wish me.

Then study study study then when i was in Math, i was called down to bilik Sivik for detention -.-

Kena bersih tingkap cause i always come late.

Then after rehat, Joey and Sheryll came to my class.

Joey was like "You're in trouble. Azlina wants to see you."

My heart was pounding faster than ever!

When i got outside, Sheryll pulled out a gift from behind her and they both wished me at the same time.

I was relieved and excited.
I hugged them and continued my studying.

Then study study then Hamzah and Ariel gave me their present.

Then it was all a blur until we got to go home.

Then it was a walk to Mcd then everything happened.

So after Mcd's we headed back to Dinie's house.
Lepaked and had so much fun partying and jamming and what not.

Then the boys left so Dinie and I watched Paranormal Activity.

Just the two of us until i fell asleep. HAHA!

Then we walked to Safa where i lepaked with Sipot, Mirmir and Dinah.

Then Sipot sent me home.

After that, i got ready and headed to Kokopelli.

Ate and what not blabla.

Now, im infront of my laptop recalling everthing i did today.

Happy? This was a superdupertrooper long post :D With pictures and everything.

OH OH! I got cupcakes from Aunty Sal.

Lawaaa kaaaan? HEHE.

LOVES IT!

Hehe.

Tomorrow imma post my life in cheer :)

So, tyeah.

I have satisfied your needs with this really long post so i shall stop here.

LOVES!

Well It's Nice To Know;

2010-04-13T10:28:00.000-07:00

Hey, readers!

Sorry my posts these past few days are like really short.

I have been not only super busy, I have also been super tired.

I haven't been having enough sleep or rest.

I can barely lepak and there's so much on my mind.

So, i'm gonna make it up by posting a looong post.

Get ready!

Last Sunday, I had my annual sports day :D

I was in 4x100 and pasukan sorak.

I won both :)

HAHAHA!

Then last Monday, i had a bola jaring tournament and lost -.-

But atleast we scored 2 goals when competing with Samad.

They are soo good -.-

Okay so that's what i've been doing.

Wanna know whats been on my mind?

Yeap, you guessed it. Love :)

I have no idea but suddenly so many people have the hots for me.

I know usually its a good thing seeing y'know, you get confirmation that you are someone people like hanging out with.

But at this point in time, it's getting rather irritating.
Everyone is different and everything changes.
So many people are letting their true colors shine and some i can't even recognize anymore -.-

But again as i always say,

"Love is hope and i have hope!"

HAHAHA! Or something or rather -.-

But yeah. Things are definitely not as great as it seems.

Oh and to clarify, I am still single. I am still getting to know people and I still have hope on love.

Im not gonna be those kind of girls yang dah break,

"Oh i give up on love! I hate love! I don't wanna go on anymore."

Cause thats simply bullshit -.-

Love doesn't only come from a dude.

Your parents, your friends, your siblings, your cousins are ALL love!

Just open your already half shut eyes to realize that love is love.

Its all round happiness and joy :)

Another thing on my mind is something coming up soon :D

My birthday!

HAHAHAH!

Yes, darlings! You're favorite "it" girl is turning 15 this coming 21st of April :D

I soo can't wait.

Not because of presents, not because or age but because i get to meet up with loads of long lost people and get to have fun doing it :D
Im celebrating my birthday atleast 3 times this year cause I have 3 different groups to hang out with.

See what i mean by HECTIC?!

Haihh -.- Then again, i love it :D

My formspring is heating up with loads of awesome questions.

If you have ANYTHING to ask, or any advice needed, please do ask :)

I love people to get to know me.

It gives me a sense of redemption.

Not alot of people are as open to all these kinds of questions as i am.

So yeahhh :) Feel free to ask anything.

But not so personal lah :D

HAHA.

I have been listening to alot of weird songs lately. Feels pretty good :D

LOVES!

Oh Star

2010-04-08T09:36:00.000-07:00

You have done too much for me <3

To Mr Made My Day;

2010-04-04T10:26:00.000-07:00

Dont mind me. Im a passerby :)

2010 :)

2010-04-01T06:58:00.000-07:00

Remember a post i did about 2010 making me stronger?
Hell yeah it is.
Just this year alone, so many shitty things have happened. -.-
It wasn't supposed to hurt this much.
But i guess this is what has to happen.

Everyone i know has been talking behind my back saying shitty things.
Don't act like you didn't. You are as transparent as a wine glass.
They have been saying things without fully understanding all matters.
They hear half of the story and blow everything out of proportion.
It is my fault he gave up on me?
My fault he didn't want it anymore?
My fault for trying to move on from the best thing thats ever happened to me?
My fault for trying to keep an already dead relationship alive?
NO! So shut up, leave me alone and let me live my life.

Yeah i love him and hell yes i miss him.
Doesn't mean i have to wait for him to grow up and grow balls to be in a relationship.
I have a life. I don't have time to wait around for something that may or may not happen.
I love him but sometimes love isn't enough.

He just looks innocent and his slate is clean cause he can't face this break-up like a man.
So excuse me, i have another 30 years to live :)

LOVES!

There's a Ladder In My Room!

2010-03-29T09:55:00.000-07:00

My body is aching all over but i have no rest planned for it.

I shall push myself over the edge and hope to land on my feet.

So what? I'll only live to about 100.

So! Had bola jaring practice the WHOLE day!

Went to school and terus started practice. It was tiring but atleast we're getting a whole lot better. *claps*

Oh oh! I just realized that every time after a break-up, i kill by body. Literally.

Like i bury myself in sports until i cant feel my body.

Its like cigarettes. It temporarily numbs you and your heart.

Its healthier though, so yeah :)

I have poisoned my body so many times. So i owe it a lot.

I have gotten a lot of comments bout my body.

Like they say im losing weight. Idk bout that but still.

I dont care if i look skinny or what not.

I just wanna be lighter. For the sake of my bases :D

My love life has been hopeful but completely on the cool run.
I mean im taking things really chilled. Been on a few dates.

But yeahh. As i said. Things look hopeful ;)

Life on the other hand, HECTIC!

It doesnt help that i have PMR this year and studies are a crucial part of my standards.

I mean i can look sexy la and speak well and what not.

But if im not smart on paper, its just talent and looks gone to waste.

Right?

So i have been pushing myself even harder this year.

I just realized that im only free on Mondays and Tuesdays and even that im so tired to freaking open my eyes let alone go out and have fun.

Weekends aren't weekends anymore. They feel exactly like a school day -.-'

I keep telling myself.

"After PMR i can do whatever the hell i like. Just 7 more months."

Gosh! This is a long post.

I suddenly felt like writing alot.

You can exit the page if you like.

OH OH! I shall soon post a picture of my before and after scorpions.

Just too brag and show-off.

I mean i think i deserve to brag and show-off once in a while.

Right?

I mean i worked so hard -.-'

Kk la i go now.

LOVES!

Not Forgetting The Porcelain Prostitute

2010-03-28T10:17:00.000-07:00

Tears roll down her face slowly yet full of emotions.

She's hurt and angry. She was stolen from her joy.

The blood trickles down her wrists leaving stains on her flower printed skirt.

She cant help but cry and hope it gets over and done. Soon.

So last Saturday i went out. It has been a while since i went out on a Saturday.

Seeing that i have tuition on Saturdays, its nearly impossible for a hangout let alone a date.

So i made up my mind that i was going to skip just this one class and do my homework later.

I called up the best guy i know, Adruce, and made plans. It was settled. I was going on a date.

We were to meet at Curve and watch a movie. And we did.

So the day started with us watching a movie, lepaking, talking.

After the movie, we met up with Leysha and Lee and went for some meatballs.

After the meatballs, we went to look for candles for Earth Hour later that night.

As soon as we finished walking, taking pictures and buying the candles, we rushed to get a cab.

We got a cab and headed to Desapark City.

There we waited and guess what happened?

Adruce's phone fell into one of the big drains.

Luckily Leysha's phone didnt drop too.

So anyways, we waited for Vee, Rejaie and Awaina.

They finally got to where we were so we set up the candle seeing it was getting late and Earth Hour was minutes away.

After lighting the candles, we got donuts.

We sang, danced, talked and were complete teenagers that night. (except Rejaie)

We were then joined by Lum, Loong, Fung and Ikhwan :)

Anyways, after that we went back to Safa and watched the Football match and met Brian Aaron.

We lepaked and ate for awhile until Mama picked us up and brought us home.

Adruce and Awaina followed us back.

Adruce left at 3 and Awaina left at 7.

The night was crazyy and fun. I was so glad it happened the way it did :)

LOVES!

The Taste The Touch

2010-03-27T14:23:00.000-07:00

Yeah i know.

Whatever.

Two words, Ug-Lee.

2010-03-26T12:58:00.000-07:00

Each passing second of the ticking clock pulls me down even more.
I'm a slave to time.
I barely have the time to stop and take a breath.

I am constantly on the move.

Not my body, my mind.

So, since life has been majorly hectic, i haven't had the time to meet friends i haven't seen in awhile.

Everyone changed. Okay maybe not everybody. But majority.

It sends chills up my spine.

Dear Mr B,

I am here. Dont forget that.

Dear Mr A;

I love you. Always will.

Dear Mr H;

Tell me your problems, i know you need it.

Dear Single Life,

2010-03-24T10:11:00.000-07:00

You have drained me completely with never ending questions running about in my head.

You have lived up to my expectations and deceived me for the best.

You were so surreptitious, you crept up behind me and slit my throat.

I needed you but in the end, like everything else, you were undecipherable.

I try to scream as i choke back tears but nothing flows out except white lies.

Try me, heart. Lock, choke me down. Size me up, make it rough.

I'll gain more strength to go on and you'll fade in time. Love is hope. And i have hope.

Always had, always will.

Nothing Is What It Seems by Saosin :)

2010-03-21T08:32:00.000-07:00

You look like you're letting go

I know that you won't call on me
You look like you're letting go
I know what my instincts are telling me
And you're fading out
It's so hard without you
This wasn't my fault

Tell me how am I supposed to live without you
This is all that I remember before you changed
You're stuck in the dream with next to nothing
I'm all alone and nothings what it seems
Without you next to me

Sometimes it feels like home
So safe in the shade
But when the summer fades
There's always something missing
And now that I'm on my own
I know why you just
Just couldn't stop
And why you had to leave
It's so hard, without you
This wasn't my fault

Tell me how am I supposed to live without you
This is all that I remember before you changed
You're stuck in the dream with next to nothing
I'm all alone and nothings what it seems
Without you next to me

I never imagined I would feel so lost
I never imagined it would be so hard
I never imagined I would feel so lost
I never imagined this would be so hard

Tell me how am I supposed to live without you
This is all that I remember before you changed
You're stuck in the dream with next to nothing
I'm all alone and nothings what it seems
Without you next to me

Tell me how am I supposed to live without you
This is all that I remember before you changed
You're stuck in the dream with next to nothing
I'm all alone and nothings what it seems
Without you next to me

Tell me how am I supposed to live without you
Tell me how am I supposed to live without you

Of course i miss you.

Think Of You Later In My Empty Room

2010-03-20T07:12:00.000-07:00

My mind is all for you.

Its easier to give up than move on.

So, i'm at home in my room. Alone.

I have nothing to do and nowhere to go.

So of course i use these times to set back, relax and think things over.

I must say i love some alone time.

So since i have been thinking, i shall share some thoughts.

1. I have been in love with a guy for the past year and four months so it nearly impossible to say me not we anymore. And its weird talking to him with no i love yous or i miss yous. It's weird but this is something i think both of us have made our minds up on. We love each other but our relationship came to it's highest peak. And we need time apart. So to Mr Hashbrown, thanks for the best Year and Four Months of my life.

2. I know that if i dont move and get out, i'm never going to be more than who i am. I need to get up, get dressed and get out. Meet new people, see new things, feel new feelings and get hurt again. I have just so many hours till my last breath is drawn. I have made my mind up. After PMR, party and i wont care about whoever or whatever comes my way. The yana everyone knew and thought was gone, shall be brought back up and awakened.

3. I'm freaking lucky that Mell and Jeja are here by my side no matter what happens. Like i actually feel like things may stay. And i like it. Finally, friends i can see myself growing up with. They make me feel like shit but pick me up later. Exactly how bestfriends feel like. *takes deep breath* Smells good.

I guess that bout it.

LOVES!

Typical Typo

2010-03-19T13:25:00.000-07:00

These past few days have been a major roller coaster.

I have been happy, sad, depressed, rejuvenated, relieved, content and vulnerable.

I forgot to tell you guys that i went out to Sunway with a few friends.

Mell, Jeja, Danial Bek, Adam and Irfan.

At first i really didn't want to go.

I thought it was gonna be awkward, silent and weird.

But after hours of pujuking, I said yes.

So i got up, got ready with my girls and headed off to Sunway.

Met Bek then Adam then Irfan.

It was awkward at first but things got better.

We played games, walked around, talked, laughed and it was so fun.

After lepaking, truth or dare and loads more, Mell, Jeja and I rushed back to BSD.

The day was simple, brief but exactly what i needed.

They made me feel so good.

It's times like this im thankful to have people like these in my life.

Thanks, guy! Mwah! (L)

LOVES!

Autumn

2010-03-18T10:29:00.001-07:00

Hey there people!
So many questions, no answers.
So here are the answers to some questions i have been asked many times.

1. You broke up with Harith?!
Yes. Technically.

2. Why!?
He wanted it. What else do i do? I guess i wasn't enough for him. Not what he wanted at the end of the day. Idk?

3. Are you okay?
Perfectly fine, really. Im doing better than i thought i would.

4. Is he okay?
I dont know. I want to know, but he's making it hard.

5. When?
Exactly A year and Four months into the relationship.

6. Do you still love him?
Yeah! I do. But he gave me a glimpse of how the future looks like by how this relationship ended. So, i don't know if we will ever be together again.

7. Will you guys remain friends?
I want to but it's all up to Harith.

Okay so thats the end of the relationship questions.
Now, the questions after the relationship questions.

1. Where have you been?
I have been crazy busy. Like fo shiz! I have Charm, Tuition, Friends and i go to the gym frequently now. Its good cause i have been improving :)

2. Why so sombong?
No im not. Really! Its just that when i have a life, its hard keeping up to date with EVERYONE i now. So, tyeah. Think it over.

and lastly

3. Who you seeing now?
*kening kening* HAHA! No lah. Im not "seeing" anyone YET! I mean moving on right now is supercallifagaslisticexpiallydocious hard. So im taking things slow and chilled but i have my eye on someone ;)

OKAY! Dah! Finish! Now go and gossip bout other people! HAHA
Kk, nak tidur.

LOVES!

Taken from Vee :)

2010-03-11T08:41:00.000-08:00

What did you last cry over?:
Harith. I think. Im not sure :S

What's the last mistake you made?:
Treating someone too nicely.

Who was the last person you said I love you to?:
Harith :)

Who last slept in your bed?:
No one. I sleep on a mat in my parent's room. Tell me! Who wants to!?

Where do you want to be?:
The gym. I feel like running on the thread mill or lifting some weights :(

Do you honestly love your friends?:
Yeap. But i still trust no one completely :S Baaaaaaad memories :(

Who can always make you happy?:
My Family, Friends and Harith N :)

Who do you love to talk to the most?:
Harith and Mell mostly. Cause topics never end :D

Who hates you?:
Who doesnt? *lifts an eyebrow*

Who do you hate?:
Dislike quite a few but no hate. I love to love. So hate isnt in my vocabulary.

How often do you cry?:
Not very often. I became stronger. Whee :D

Are you a virgin?:
Yes you retarded little survey -.-

Ever smoked?:
Used to but i gave up on negative things and turned a new leaf.

Gotten high?:
On life :) Everyday.

How much do you weigh?:
50 fucken kgs -.-'

How tall are you?:
157cm :D i grew two inches since i was standard 2 :(

Given a lap dance?:
Yes but to same sex -.-"

Made-out?:
Haha :)

Rolled on the ground w/ the opposite sex?:
Yeah :)

Been wet with your clothes on?:
Yeap :D

Made fun of a fat person?:
Hahaha. Only deserving :)

Laughed at someone?:
Mell :) All the time >:)

Been touched by the same sex?:
Yes? Weirdo.

Ever been Horny?:
Uhh yea. That comes with puberty -.-

Looked at porn?:
Yeah. Practically grew up with men.

Thought about sex?:
Yes :)

Had a "dirty" dream?:
Unconciously 0.0

Most missed Memory?:
After PMR Party 08 too. :)

So, Let's Get This Rock Rolled;

2010-03-06T09:22:00.000-08:00

Well hello human being!
Long time no hear.

Sorry my last post was shitty and all over the place.
I suddenly rushed out of blogging for something else.
Like what? *evil laughter*

So anyways, i have told you all before how i wanna go to Melbourne to study.
But i did not go into detail WHAT i wanted to do.
So, today imma blog about my love and drive to keep me going.

*drum rolls*

Psychology!

So let me start by saying why i wanna take up psychology.

1. I would love to study in detail different behaviours of human beings. Why they say something, why the do something. What drives them to do it and keep doing it. These little little easy things i have grown up wondering since i could think. Its not something everyone wants to do and i dont blame them. No one wants to listen anymore. They wanna talk.

2. I feel as if it's a sense of escape if you may call it from the real world. I mean not everyone understands me or any other psycho out there. I feel like when im with these as you may call it weird people, i feel like home :)

So anyways! Thats a bit bout it

I dont wanna go into detail just yet.
Drop a comment if you wanna know more bout the history of Psychology la.
I malas nak explain :D HAHA

Life has been pretty dull and boring.
I mean everything is moving so darn fast i cant even enjoy the moment for now.
Maybe im having too much fun that time pasts fast or maybe its so boring my brain just skips through everything.
I go to school zombi-fied. I dont learn, i dont wanna learn and i dont care.
I just know to wake-up, get ready, go to school on time, write down what they want you too and finish the homework.
Everything else is blank -.-'

But even in all the bad there are two goods.
Like bola jaring for starters.
We are ALL getting along and its funny cause every year, there are different clicks but this year, nope!
Everything and everyone are so glued tight together and i must say im liking it.

Second is Charm :)
I have been improving in my stunts and i are happy! :D
Steph was back for awhile and even she saw how much i improved.
Whoots-de-whee!
Now all i have to do is single basing and improve my flexibility -.-"
Long LOOOOOOONNGGGG way to go, Sharifah Aryana. (please ignore name)

Harith and I are fine is anyone is wondering.
I dont blog much bout him lately.
Idk. Maybe the upcoming anniversarry eh? ;D

Kk, wanna star-dee.

LOVES!

Boy, don't they have fun?

2010-02-24T07:24:00.000-08:00

(Taken from Vee :D)

I 've got more wit, better kiss, harder touch, a better fuck.

- Panic! At The Disco

Helloooo!

HAHA

So i know i have been MIA alot lately but thats because i'm literally gasping for air trying to catch up with school work.

No problemo, i have the time and inspiration to type down what i feel at the moment.

Plus, Joanne and everyone else has been bugging to update soo here it is!

Anyway, Dear Leyla, (the name of my newly named blog)

My mood right now is indifferent so i shall explain.

I found this song on my limewire.

Its under Panic! At The Disco but it's most definitely NOT!

But nevermind i still am enjoying it nonetheless.

Very indie and calming. Just wished i knew who the willi-wonka it is so that i can actually limewire yer ass.

Haihhh. Tensionized myself there for awhile.

So anyways! I have been practicing for Bola Jaring the past few days.

Damn tiring! I swear! Its like building twin-towers with a toothpick.

I know! You cant begin to imagine the torture -.-"

BUT! On the bright side, i'm going to Charm tomorrow :D

Whee! :D *claps like a super duper freaked out monkey*

HAHAHA!

So if you wanna get sexy, listen to Lying Is The Most Fun Girls Can Have Without Taking Their Clothes Off by Panic! At The Disco. Ok ?

Kkk, malas nak blog dah!

HAHA!

LOVES!

A hit for the run.

2010-02-15T04:46:00.000-08:00

(Current Obsession)

Hello darlingsss!
God, you have no idea how good it is to be typing again.
I thought i lost my mojo.
Guess not!
HAHA.

These past few days have been messy :(
I need to catch up on school seeing i have been MIA for 3 weeks.
God! I forgot how much school work teachers can give.
I hate PMR already.
BUT! I vow to study hard and get back on my feet!
Just you wait teachers!

OH OH! I got a Benefit moisturizer from Harith. :D
It is fabulously expensive and i love love loveeee my boyfriend for getting it for me :D
Hehehe. I likeee i likeee.
I got him a Diana F+
For those who dont know what it is, its a lomography camera.
Interested, google it.

I have been lepaking with Mell a lot lately.
Mostly cause Jeja never wants to be with us.
JOKING!
I mean she has a boyfriend now, so i guess thats only normal.
But i miss the both of them.
Haihh.

I wanna go swimming.
Who's up for it?!

So that day at Amcorp Mall, i bought like 30 dvds for rm40 bucks.
I mean WOW!
I sooo wanna go back there. I dont usually lepak there so it was all so wow-ing.
Currently watched 3 of the 30 cds.
HAHA.
Slowly but surely k?

I watched PARANORMAL ACTIVITY!
I SURVIVED!

HAHAHA

Okay thats it with the updates.
See ya later, aligator!

LOVES!

Dear Star;

2010-02-05T10:10:00.000-08:00

Bring me back to when it all began.
To when he made me believe there was hope.
To when things made complete sense and everything was easy.
When we were happy, innocent and fresh,
When things weren't taken for granted.
When we would lay down all day doing nothing.
When masks made brought us together.
When hearts weren't broken but mended.

Cause where we are now, is so far away.

Call Me Cliche;

2010-01-30T11:49:00.000-08:00

But i believe in happy endings and fairy tale loves.

Hello Readers!

Yea yea i know i havent been blogging.

Everyone'll be like.

"Asyik emo je posts dia." or

"Its always about Harith N dia tuh" or

"WHY NO UPDATES!? I GO NUTS!"

If you have said any of the above,

I suggest you switch your laptop off,

Run to the closest 7eleven and buy yourself a life!

BUAHAHAHAH!

Kk back to what i was saying.

Well, i havent been to school in a week.

I swear that my homework is gonna be sky high.

Haihh.

I just cant wait, huh? -.-"

I need to focus.

I really do.

I think i can catch up its just that it'll be hard.

Still, who ever said that life was easy?

Imma cry every night when i get back. -.-"

Harith N (yes i know i blog about him alot, you shadapeh!) and i dah okay.

We fought, i guess? I prefer to call it a misunderstanding.

We have had loads of that but we always get better.

So, i'm buckling down for the bumpy ride and hope the airbags are enough.

Haihh, wish me a whole lotta broken bones before it does happen.

HAHA! Drama gila aku nih -.-

I lepaked with Mell and Jeja that day.

Gosh! Missed them like hell!

I mean a week without them is like a story book you have been waiting to read.

And when you open it, stories pour out like a waterfall of unkept secrets.

Amazing that only a week, we have a whole lot of things to talk about.

Imagine a month 0.0"

Changing schools will be a balll buster. Yes yes it will.

Work has been okay je.

Havent been having scenes with my beloved cast :(

Im now shooting scenes with Leysha and Nadia.

Which is Hana and Ariyani.

Oh i forgot!

DONT FORGET TO WATCH TUKAR SUKA SAMA SUKA ON ASTRO!

I have no idea what channel but its somewhere there.

Anyways, yeahh.

I miss them -.-"

And its only been two three days?

God, you can feel the impact they gave.

Just one lepak session is enough.

God! Bila nak ada scene dengan diorg?!

Oh just now i lepaked with Fatin, Nana, Bat, Syamil, Aiman and Armand.

Lama gila tak lepak with them.

Rindu gila.

They havent changed a bit.

Maybe style but they are pretty much the same Nana and Fatin.
Satu je missing!

Marin wasnt there :(

Idk where she was but that was the one thing yang tak cukup.

Haihhh.

After they left i continued to lepak with Reshan, Vee, Brandon, Chai, Ron and the gang.

We went right after work so i was still pumped.

It was so funny.

Lama gila tak lepak with these group of people.

One thing also about work,

When you arent in it yet, you want it,

When you are in the process of doing it, you want it over and done with,

When it's finished, you want to go back to where you were.

Haha,

It's funny but amazingly true and saddening.

I have gym tomorrow at Sunway.

Im going with Pawan.

I hope that a certain 'someone' doesnt show up.

The person gets on my nerves and she tries to hard.

Malu aku nak layan.

Whoa-ly shit! This is a long post.

K lahhh! I think cukup.

K k, bye!

LOVES!

Dear Jackass,

2010-01-29T06:55:00.001-08:00

Thanks

Deep in Temptation;

2010-01-29T05:36:00.000-08:00

You're like the sunset with no sun,
The apple without the seed.
Im useless and ignored.
You're amazingly fluid and inevitable.
I mean no harm, you mean no words.
I suffer this world without you.
I feel immortal.
You need me gone, i need you torn.
We lie, we love, we need, we burn each other with words so fury.
I need the love, you need the memories.

I want us, where we were.
Where things were simple and things were sweet.
You dont need me so why am i here?
I need time, for me.
You just want me for show.
Im a trophy to show off,
Im not somebody to love.

Many times have i ignored it since that day.
It all came crashing down and im too broken to let you know.
That we arent what we used to be and we will never let this go easily.

Talk to me, im here and im lonely.
I need my assurance my security.

To Love or Not To Love?

2010-01-28T07:55:00.000-08:00

Other than the fact life has been a total bitch,
The cast of TSSS has reappy brighten up my life.
We stayed at Apiit for 18 hours just to find out our last scene was cancelled.
HAHAHA.
But if it wasnt for the amazing cast, i would have killed myself.

Thanks Leysha, Afi, Zoey, Bhell, Mel C and Bea for being awesome.

Fireworks

2010-01-25T10:08:00.001-08:00

(Leysha, Bea, Nabilah, Afi, Me and Zoey)

Work isnt that much of a drag when you have people like them as a cast.
*thumbs up**does the bender*

Sorry darling readers that i haven't been updating my blog.
I updated my tumblr a few days ago through my new cool + awesome phone.
Short posts je lah. Malas nak type with my phone.
Me needsta get used to it y'knw?

So tyeahh. I have been WAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY busy these past few days cause i'm juggling

1) Work
2) Cheer
3) School
4) Boyfriend
5) Family
6) Bestfriends

I mean its so hard for me to relax and chill.
After this, i so need to run away somewhere just me and take a deep breath.
School is hectic. Im gasping for air. Barely surfacing -.-"
And im only 15.
Cant wait for SPM *sarcasm*

Anyays, work has been super duper A++
The cast, crew everyone is absolutely fun to be with.
No one and i mean NO ONE gets on my nerve or needs a slap or two.
I love it!
It makes work so much better.
I mean imagine if you have one bugger who doesnt know what to do. -.-"
Tensionized my brain.
Mhmm, yeahh yeahhh.

I have to skip school for the next two days.
Lets hope that i can make it out alive.
I know i can. I CAN!
But its gna take alot of blood and sweat.
SHIT!
I borrowed Pei Yu's book :O

I miss Harith N so badly.
The only time we got to lepak this week was for an hour.
Trust me, it isnt enough if you were me.
Minimum duration is atleast 5 hours.
Rasa macam nak mati! Gahh!

Oh did i tell you i am shooting at Apiit Smart School or known now as Sapura Smart School.
Its so AWESOME!
It has a pool, Mac pcs, air-conditioned class rooms, personal lockers, awesome uniforms.
And the best part?
I HAVE A 80% CHANCE OF GOING THERE NEXT YEAR!
Like oh-am-geee! HAHAHAH
I so cannot wait.
I so wanna go.
I wanna go i wanna go i wanna go.
I can list so many reasons why i will do ANYTHING to go there next year.
*crosses fingers and prays to god continuesly*
HAHAHA.

K la, call time's at 8am and its 3am -.-"

LOVES!

Son of a Gun!

2010-01-17T08:12:00.000-08:00

Hooo, god i look freaky in this picture! :O

Sorry lovely readers!
I have been on shoot as u all who follow me know so i havent had time to post anything up.
Like on Saturday alone i was out for 24 hours on end -.-"
I love my job i love my job.

Tomorrow im going to school.
After 4 days of no school its a bit of a drag to go back to school.
But the only motivation is PMR.
So shingz wan -.-"

I know i didnt write this any earlier but

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOEY KHONG!

My only cina brother :)

I love you, everything china!

We spent today for Joey since i wasnt there for his mini celebration.
I just hope a little of what i did was enough, though :D

Im so bored and i have no idea what else to write about.
Ya'll can give me ideas on what to write.
Gots to go!

LOVES!

Lucky Number 15 :)

2010-01-15T07:27:00.000-08:00

To my Boyfriend, Bestfriend, Soul-mate etc etc,

Happy One Year Two Months <3

Nothings Bigger Than Love

2010-01-12T11:25:00.000-08:00

Finally! A picture :D
Imma post more soon. Sorry yea?

So someone missed school today.
Guess who la kan?
I havent been feeling whooptidoop.
AND! I has a infections. :D
On my toe. It hoirts :(
Imma have to gets meself a minor surgery.
YEAH! HAHA.

I slept the whole day therefore, my eyes need no more rest.
I hope imma be okay tmrw.
Lets pray i get through atleast 2 scenes.
HAHA!
Oh yeah. Im going to be in a drama with the devil herself, Leysha.
Yipee kaiyay! *jumps and hits heels together*

I so miss school.
Like not learning for a day makes me feel dumb -.-"
I need to open and smell my gorgeous used books.
Okay, eew. But nonetheless, i do miss them.
I prefer to be referred to as Rajin not dork -.-"
Terimakasih Samasama.

Sorry this post is a bit merata-rata.
Im having a burst of brilliance. (which usually means im hyper)

I have been shopping ALOT!
I always go to Cotton On.
If only i can work there :/
Oh and i bought a cute top from Forever 21 that i must say it was once in a blue moon kind of thing.
I love Forever 21 and Topshop but i love my money more.
BUAHAHAH!

Oh last Sunday, I watched my lovely adorable sexy little bestfwen in action.
Ziany Zakri, my delicious sexy mommah was in Whoa! Willow, a play.
I was soo proud of her. So pretty so talented.
I was close to blit'in tears!
She play a girl from the future. So style baju dia, me like ;D

I think the play was all in all very smart.
Very creative and well put together.
The script and one-liners were so smart and cute.
Everyone in the cast complimented each other very well.
Good job and congrats for everyone involved. :)

Had a nice chat with Farzana or better known as Ana comel. :D
I still cant get over the fact she's 18 -.-"
I seriously thought she was my age or 16.
Oh wells, i look old, she looks young.
She is so smart which surprises me that her ex even got her.
The ex isn't what you call boyfriend material.
Haha. Kan, Ana? ;D

I had a nice weekend. Maybe i'll post pictures up.
Just maybe. Ya'll better pray i do. Huahaha!

I just know that she warms my heart,

And knows what all my imperfections are.

And she said that i was the brightest little firelfly

in her jar.

- Copeland

I guess thats it ;D
Kk, chow!

LOVES!

Leysha by Yana :D

2010-01-11T22:19:00.000-08:00

She scared Hades into giving her hell then she had sex with him and killed him.

In the car with thy arents and Satan's even more demonic ex-wife.

My room is gna be pink white white pink.

Leysha's is more black black black blood.

What's Leysha's favourite food?

Nothing. Leysha doesnt eat. She feeds off people's souls.

She makes Lucifer seem amateur.

I dont want to go to hell.

At hell's gate, I'll be like "Eyy, leysha? What you doing here?"

And she'll be like "I own this place."

0.0"

The devil's coming out to play.

*looks at Leysha*

But she's still here!

You know the movie The Happening?

Yea, when Leysha exhales, that happens.

People kill themselves.

I was walking home and a dog barked at me.

Yea, cause they see evil.

Aww! Leysha so pretty.

So corpse bride like that.

She may be Satan but she's my sister, fucknuts!

I got lost in Leysha's hair.

I love my sister so bad :D

This is a collection of things i have said about her.

I know, i'm in a roll :D

Parasites;

2010-01-08T09:44:00.000-08:00

She looks as normal as normal is :)

School has been diturbingly wonderful.
I am concentrating much much more than i did last year, thats for sure.
I rarely sleep nowaddays :)
Only if the teacher doesnt come in then i sleep :D

So tyeahh, anyways, life hasn't been as good though.
The stress is getting to me. Im tired 70% of the time and the other 30% im sleeping.
Friend's come and go like the seasons.
Basicly, my body's is here learning and living life but my soul is flying sky high.
Im soo not me anymore.

Something has been bothering me.
Parasites and or leaches.
The type of people that cling on to you, sucks the living daylights outta you and leaves you.
I have had many and they never fail to annoy me.
It sad to me lah.
That their lives are so pathetic and dull they have to ikut every single thing orang lain buat.
No originality at all -.-"

Kk, banyak homework nak buat.

LOVES!

Quote me;

2010-01-06T00:43:00.000-08:00

I'm not creative just honest.
-Yana-

Future References;

2010-01-05T08:58:00.000-08:00

There may be possibilities we are going seperate ways.

This year i'm sitting for my PMR :)
I know i know. You people suck.
So anyways, i have finally understood what i need to do and i know what i want. (finally)

Im moving schools next year and i'm going to Melbourne University or Monash Melbourne.
I am making a choice and i'm confident i can do this.
Wish me luck and lots of broken legs. :)

Oh where im going next year?
Im not sure yet :)

So, 8a's;

HERE I COME!

Remember?

2010-01-03T04:28:00.000-08:00

When i threw myself on you cause i missed you so bad.
When i accidentally kicked you face.
When we sang along to high school musical and didnt feel dumb.
When we took 15 minutes to paste the paper stars.
When you picked me up when i was at my all time low.
When we first met and my eyes were glued to you.
When the first thing you said to me was "OMG you listen to Mayday Parade, i love you already." When i found your mask on the floor and gave it to you.
When i gave you my bangle.
When we came up with Fagfag.
When you dared me to eat chili sauce.
When we watched reruns of OC for the fucks of it.

I hurt you, you hurt me, it's all a game.

Mind my thoughts.

2010-01-02T13:09:00.000-08:00

People judge me when they themselves are too be judged.

Right now only one thing is repeating in my head.
I know he didn't mean it, but it doesn't mean it didn't hurt.
I love you, i'm sorry.

Funny thing is, when i'm all over him, he pushes me away.
But when i leave him, he gets angry.
When will i ever win with him? -.-"
I know i was somewhat wrong.
But it wasn't as if i totally ignored him.

We had dinner and lepaked, what?
I'm sorry la.
But why should I?
It's not entirely my fault.

I had fun, sue me.

Sweet Escapeh :)

2010-01-02T12:28:00.000-08:00

All in all, it was AWESOME!

I just got back from Sweet Escape. Its a party organized by Jowyna from Electric.
I must say, for a newbie, thumbs up :)

The performances were awesome but sadly i missed Nikki's :(
I was hungry and i went to eat, by the time i came back, everyone was dancing.
It was so cool.
I finally got to dance with Harith. Slow dance that is. :D

Being the typical me, i was on the dance floor 24/7.
It was so cool.
Haven't had that much fun on a dance floor since After Pmr Party :D

But you know, every good day has it's consequences. -.-
Lets not elaborate -.-

School starts tomorrow.
Kk, malas.
Will upload pictures later!

LOVES!

Happy New Year, New Year!

2010-01-01T13:40:00.001-08:00

One thing certain in life is change.

I found out first hand.

Above are a few pictures of the past and present.

Wouldnt it be extra freaky if i wrote future? *keningkening*

I, Sharifah Aryana, admit that i have change so much in one year!

I have learned to not trust everyone.

I have learned true friends stay no matter what.

I have learned love doesnt pick an age.

I have learned all the form1 and 2 subjects :D

I have learned how to keep my hopes up.

I have learned to leave the bitter and not hold a grudge.

I have learned to love and be thankful of EVERYTHING i have and/or had :)

I have learned to suffer my own consequences.

I have learned that if you're ugly in the inside, you're plain ugly.

I have learned that being fake shows.

I have learned "ways to control your anger" >:)

I have learned to become a better leader.

I have made choices not all good.

I have been a bad daughter/friend/girlfriend, but atleast i realized.

I haven't been completely honest but atleast i have been 80% of the time.

I have learned how the truth DOES hurt. And it hurts more when you hear it yourself through the phone.

I learned that not all things are sweet and worth remembering.

I have learned to forgive but NEVER forget.

I have learned to be cold to those who deserve it.

In one year, i have loved and lost.

I have lead and followed.

I have met and forgotten.

I have found and misplaced.

If in one year, i have changed so much,

2010, i swear, you'll only make me stronger.

2010;

1. Be a better daughter and friend.

2. 8 A's for PMR.

3. Forgive easier.

4. Improve in school and cheer.

5. Two years with Harith N.

LOVES!

How One Person Can Change You;

2009-12-30T13:02:00.001-08:00

Its 5am and im still awake.

My brain wont let me sleep.

So i let my brain juices work.

I keep thinking of how 2010 will be and only one thing pops up.

Lets not elaborate :)

2009 was an awesome year.

But i must say that it was disappointing.

Most of my resolutions became a mere idea.

So im hoping 2010 will make it for me.

A new decade, a new found hope?

Maybe?

While laying in bed doing absolutely nothing,

I keep thinking.
Have i chosen another road to take, how will i be like right now?

Imagine, if i hadn't gone to After Pmr Party,

My love life will still be in the dumpster.

If i hadn't met Harith, my life will be me depending on fake people.

If i hadn't had the strength from him to keep going on,

Exactly where will i be?

This kind of questions scare me.

Imagine if i hadn't met Harith N.

Things will still be fake, i would still care what people think.

I would still be falling for the wrong guys and breaking more hearts.

I admit it was hard changing oh so much,
But it seemed all the worth it for Harith.

You can say he's the light in my dark dark days.

I have became a wonderful person because of him, i admit.

And i wont have made anything different.
He helped me mature.

Dont believe me?

Read my 2009 January 1st posts.

I swear the odds are uncanny.

Its been a year one month,

Soon 2 months,

In this period of time,

We have had our doubts, our falls and all.

Ego was thrown out of proportion, thrown away.

Hearts were broken and mended.

I admit it hasnt been a bucket of roses.

Each day is a challenge.

But I would go through a lot worst than not having him around.

Harith, this post is for you.

Wether you read it or not.

I want you to know, in many ways, you have changed me into a better person.

You made me who i am today.

Whatever we have been through has been the best experiances i will ever go through.

Your the reason i keep going.

I know this is cliche but your my everything.

The energy i feed off from.

The reason i get up, eat, sleep, walk, talk.

Your my sweet escape, my beautiful rescue.

How else can i express it now?

I love you, Harith.

Oh so much <3

Ms Sexy Librarian :)

2009-12-30T07:42:00.000-08:00

New Year's Bitch :/

So the picture is my new glasses!
Whoot!
Im not the kind of girl that likes branded goods but the rims were half price!
So it was the kind of offer you'd be daft to pass on.
I did it yesterday and i got them today.
Got them at Opulence.
They are really really good :)
Oh oh look for a dude called Yuz if you wanna get glasses.

Anyways!
Im not too happy bout New Year's this year cause things are gna change alot next year.
BUT! I am gna have a small get-together at my house.
Just close friends, so sorry if you arent invited :)
We are gna lepak at my house cause everywhere else is gna be crowded and thts irritating.
So we made it a point to lepak somewhere near.

Did you get your school stuffs?
I did.
Im remiscing already.
Haihh.
Next year's gna be weird.
The first day of school Jeja, Mell and I going together.
Hehe.

Kk, malas.

LOVES!

Smile Bright :)

2009-12-29T08:40:00.000-08:00

Addicted to Letters & Light (currently).

So did anyone tell you NEVER to shop at the end of the year?

Why?

CAUSE ITS AN ABSOLUTE JUNGLE!

I almost got hit at Ou cause someone thought i wanted to get their bag -.-"

It was scary shitt!

Haihh.

Anyways, Harith N and i went out today.

He teman me get my school stuff :D

Which was so fun.

See the thing is, we both are different.

He wants his things.

And i want mine.

His things dont interest me, mine doesnt interest him.

So basicly, we had a hell of a rally just shopping.

HAHA!

On another note, i bought school shoes, some plain t-shirts and a wife beater.

Now the awesome part!

Since im a athletic girl is school, meaning i do a lot of running and sports,

I decided to buy trackpants that can actually last 2 falls.

So i bought an Adidas trackpants.

Usually, Adidas'll be like rm130++

BUT! Guess how much i got MY trackpants? :)

rm99.99

I know right!?! Damn cheap.

So happy with my buy :)

Oh oh! Another thing,

I bought new CHEER SHOES! WHOOT!

Its white, shiny, light and rm80 -.-"

I know i shouldnt have but it was just too good to pass on :D

Tmrw, Joey, Sheryll, Harith and I are going on a double date.

So that'll be the 5th double date im going on this year :D

Pretty awesome.

New Years is close :/

That means its getting closer to a seperation :')

Lets just hope god wants me to keep him :')

Imma go cry now.

LOVES!

Pika?

2009-12-28T08:49:00.000-08:00

So just now, plans of mine were cancelled.

At first it was supposed to be like, get school stuff then go Desapark.

CANCELLED!

I woke up, got ready and we went straight to Desapark -.-"

Okay so anyways,

We went to Desapark for our lovely pervert's farewell party.

Lucas Thomas Pickering, the one and only, is going back to Hong Kong this 30th.
And seeing how much we ALL love him, we threw him a little byebye party :)

We gathered at Dpc, bought food and drinks and had a picnic.

It was so good until it started to rain but the girls and i didnt see it as negative.

We jumped and threw rocks and everything.

Oz-some!

Leysha, Harith, Luke, Vee, Brandon, Nicole, Joey, Pawan, Amad, Amer semua ada.

It was so funzies!

After the rain stopped, we made our way back to Safa.

I lepaked Harith's house jap waiting for Leysha just to find out she went home already -.-"

So since my plan of getting my school stuff did NOT happen, Harith is gna teman me tmrw.

So, tyeahh.

This post will be followed by a somewhat letter to Luke :)

I'll post the pictures up soon, kayh? :)

Dear Lukey;

You are the sweetest, funniest, one of a kind of guy.

Never in a million years have i met or will i meet someone as great as you.

Im not shitting you. U are like a brother to me.

I shall forever cherish you :)

Have a awesome New Year's but dont forget us Malaysians, kayh? :)

I love you, Luke <3

Kk, dah dah.

LOVES!

Asha's First blog :'D

2009-12-27T12:33:00.000-08:00

First she was like whuut?

Then she's like sooo shiny.

She starts to type and everything is frustrating.

And then she's done!

So here it is;

rfdejliiuly534nuly,m,svnbgfmhtdwy 42qvvhjkl;''8 TYF BNTGHGGUHCERAH3WE4

W4223WEWWFPP210MM ZXHYYI BNBGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG2SDF67 4VG8 BNGTBVVVVVVVVVVV VAB N NNNNNNNNNNNNNN 2Z7 6yocu 9l..0q2 l

txdQ

',p nm

COMEL KANN!?

Keep reading for Aza's :D

Kk, tidok first.

LOVES!

There might be a million and one reasons;

2009-12-27T09:59:00.000-08:00

Why my heart is totally, eternily, completely, emotionally and mentally devoted to everything you say or do.

And when your not here with me, i can give you only one reason why we shall NEVER be apart and that is because,

I Love You <3

Top Five Part 2;

2009-12-26T09:36:00.001-08:00

I loike movies.
I have seen so many movies i have lost count.
I like it though.
Movies help with your imagination and mind.
Imagine a hard days work and you come home all stresses out.
You put on a film and your relaxed.
In a whole new setting.
Yeahh, thats what i like.

So here are my Top Five Romantic Comedies;

Definitely, Maybe is amazingly wonderful.

Not only does it show love between lovers, it also shows love between family.

I love how the chose Ryan Reynolds to play the lead role cause he does it so well.

He plays a funny, single father, down-to-earth but ambitious small town boy.

And when his little daughter askes him about her mother,

he then has to tell her the story about his past loves.

This is when things get juicy.

We then find out he is in love with this fun, energetic and free thinking girl.

Its sweet cause this kind of love stories are possible.

Simple, sweet and down right heart-warming :)

Down With Love is a story about an ex assistant to this big time magazine editor who

writes a book about him.

She gets back at him by making him fall in love with her.

Thats big seeing that he is one of the biggest playboys in town.

So they fall in love and she makes him suffer.

But at the end of the day, he changes and she forgives him.

A sweet tale bout love and revenge.

All in all, awesome :)

What Happens in Vegas is a very funny very sweet story.

Its about this two very different people who accidentally gets married with each other.

They have to go through this process of living with each other for 3 months in order to get divorce.

So they have to (sadly) go through it and they end up falling in love with each other.

Its a funny, sweet, heart-warming kind of love story.

This movie made my gut bleed but at the same time heart beat.

About love, laughter and friendship.

Good Luck Chuck is a hillarious tale of a cursed man, Dane Cook.

The curse is that if a girl has been with him, she gets married to the next guy she's with.

It's all fine until he fell in love with this girl, Jessica Alba.

He then has to fins a way to break the curse before she leaves him for her next guy.

At the end, he breaks the curse and they fall madly in love with each other.

All in all sweet, funny and clever.

And last but not least, The Perfect Catch.

I accidentally watched this movie on HBO

and ever since then, it has been my favourite romantic comedy.

Its about this baseball crazed man, Jimmy Fallon who falls for

hardworking Drew Barrymore.

Things are fine until baseball interupts the relationship.

So he ends up selling his Red Sox tickets.

When she finds out, she runs across the field just to get to him

so that he doesnt sell his inherited tickets.

So sweet, so funny, so simple, so cute!

This couple reminds me of Harith and I

cause Jimmy Fellon in this movie is very fun and out-going and childish

on the other hand, Drew Barrymore is more serious and matured.

Opposites attract and it give the relatinship a healthy balance.

I love it!

So thats my Top Five Romantic Comedies.

Im gonna blog about more Top Fives so stay loyal and keep reading.

Kk, malas.

LOVES!

My Hottie Hottie Mr Lovey Dovey!

2009-12-26T04:38:00.001-08:00

This is what I'm talking about.

He plays the fucked up party boy who has a soft side after all.

He's rough around the edges but loyal and sweet when he's in love.

Its soo sweet :D

Plus, he is very very the hot!

UPGRADE!

So that's Joseph Dempsie.

Kk, malas.

LOVES!

Top Five Part 1;

2009-12-26T04:07:00.000-08:00

Joe Dempsie, lick meeee! :)

I have watched a well share of Tv series yes, everyone knows.
Oh and Joe Dempsie plays Chris Miles in Skins and he's awesomely hot!
So, these are my top five :D

The L word :)
I watched the first and second season and got hooked!
But sadly, i havent had time to finish all the seasons :(

I have watched all season 1-5 and the movie!

Im waiting patiently for the second movie.

Yes i are! :D

I watched one episode on tv and i was literally going MAD for it!

This series was the ONLY series i actually followed on tv :D

I am so in love with the characters even until now.

I havent watched the latest season but i am waiting for it to come on to dvd :D

I'll buy it even if it was thousands of bucks :D

ANYBODY! Tell me how to download the series k!?

I started watching The OC thanks to Harith N <3

He was a loyal fan of The Oc and i was a loyal fan of One Tree Hill.

So, he MADE me watch one episode and i must admit, i fell in love.

So, i bought all four seasons and porked at home to finish watching them :D

Harith is my Seth Cohen, k baybee? :D

Last but surely not least, SKINS!
I have no idea how to explain how much i LOVE skins!
At first i didnt want to watch it cause it seemed boring.
But i know take back every crap word i said!
This is by far my FAVOURITE tv series!
But i only like seasons 1 & 2.
I dont like season 3 not only cause its boring,
But the cast is different and i hate that -.-"
I swear Skins have the best looking cast EVER!
And i am a sucker for accents ;D

Okayyy okayy i guess thats it. Imma blog bout my other top 5's k?
Keep checking up for my top five's ;)

Kk, malas!

LOVES!

To Superman;

2009-12-25T09:04:00.000-08:00

I am god damn sorry if i did something wrong.

I have no idea but i feel like somehow i did something wrong.

I am oblivious to this kind of things, so shed some light, let me in.

Im sorry but i hope im worth the forgiving.

So today was pretty jam packed :D

Went to Mell's, walked to Xenia's and took a cab to Lee's :D

Met a few people i havent met in awhile.

Nana and Alia <3

So started the day with a brush of teeth, the wash of face, the short bath.

Went down stairs and planned the day with Mama :D

She said Papa and her were gonna go for lunchen so might as well send me.

Blablabla spent few hours at Mell's house and walked to Xenia's.

At Xenia's, Mell and I literally STUFFED our faces with loads and loads of lamb :D

*drools reminiscing :D*

Then met Alia Ameera, lepaked awhile and the taxi was here to bring us to Lee's.

Got to Lee's house and stuffed our faces, AGAIN!

HAHAHAH!

But this time, smores! Whoot whoot!?

Never tasted smores before. Does pop tarts count? *nervous laughter*

So tyeahh, loves it!

After Lee's lepaked at Safa with Nana and Bat for awhile then it was time to go home.

But idk why, i feel like something is wrong.

Like i did something to Harith *nervous*

I think im paranoid or maybe i know Harith too well.

Either way, imma make it right.

LOVES!

Ho ho whore!

2009-12-24T09:40:00.000-08:00

So before anything,
Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year!
to all readers, followers, etc etc.. :)

I just got home from Curve.
We started with just watching a movie and ended up staying until right before the countdown.
Trust me, we didnt even know there was a countdown.
Lee and I went into the Foam Mosh Pit!
We ran and sprayed everything, everywhere!
HAHAHAH!
He pulled my back and swung me and i hit a person i did NOT know!
HAHAHAHAH, fckng hillarious :D

This year, i wanna celebrate Christmas.
Not cause i menentang agama or what not.
But cause this year, i have a boyfriend who DOES celebrate and i wanna celebrate with him.
Not my first time celebrating but! this year is lucky.
Tmrw, imma go Xenia's house then maybe Lee's house.
I dont know yet, so tyeahh :D

Today was another random day out.
But it was awesome :D
Tomorrow, Mell's sleeping over again :D
Whoot!

Kk, malas!

LOVES!

Theres A War In Your Bedroom, Baby;

2009-12-23T07:01:00.000-08:00

Bloodshot eyes, valentines, and goodbyes.
So five minutes ago!

So basicly today was simple.

1. Sent Sister number 2 to airport.
2. Lepaked with Superman (the above) the whole day.
3. Had lunchen with the peoples. (Vee, Joey, Ikhwan, Bryan etc etc..)
4. Safa with the same people and Sister number 3.

After SOOOOOO LONG of not lepaking with Harith N, i had a whole day to just us :D
It felt soo good. Felt like the OLD us again.
Laughing, chilling, having fun watching movies and what not.
Made my day y'knw?

Lunch was hillarious. After so long of not climbing anything,
I CLIMBED A WALL!
We climbed over it to get into Jalan Kenanga.
Adventure? I know! (atleast to me it is -.-)
So tyeah. We walked to Domino's and ate like there was no tmrw!
I swear to god! Domino's never tasted that good. HAHAH!

Mell (THY BESTIE!) is here :D
Sleeping over, AGAIN! HAHAH!
Jeja is at home. No permission, so tyeah.
Lets just say Mell and I talk alot ;)

Two things are getting on my nerves.

1. Unoriginal basterds :)
2. Fake wannabees.

K k, malas nak elaborate.

LOVES!

Let lovers love;

2009-12-22T10:04:00.000-08:00

I havent been blogging or even tumblr-ing these past few days.
But i have been checking up on my fav blogs.

So, tyeah :)

Life hasnt been a bed of roses but i must say, it hasnt been a pile of shit either.

I have been lepaking with my bestfriends for the past week.

Everyday for the past WEEK!

We did EVERYTHING together!

It is hillarious.

HAHAHA!

But truth is, i never get bored of them.

They arent fake, y'knw?

So the boyfriend and i are better.

I guess, hope?

Gona lepak tmrw.

Im taking a cuti from my besties and gonna lepak with him <3

Talking bout besties, i miss my other besties.

Adruce and Ziany.

Havent lepaked with them in awhile.

Like, i met Adruce a week ago or so.

I havent seen Ziany for weeks dah.

Last time was at Curve :D

So, tyeahh.

I hate it when people try to be like me -.-"

I hate when they be like "Your perfect!"

AHAHAHAHAH!

Thats utter bullshit!

Idk la.

I guess im okay with it.

But it irritates the shit outta me.

GET ORIGINAL!

Kk, malas.

LOVES!

Tired, perspired and down-right frustrated;

2009-12-20T08:09:00.000-08:00

This is gonna be a small insignificant post. Just cause Kak Nani is on MY laptop so its hard for me to get photos and stuff.

Cheer Jam 2009;

Was awesome! Learn a whole new side to cheerleading and met a whole lot of new people :D

Im serious, cheerleaders are really friendly. I need to improve in soooo many ways.

I have no idea why la but going to Cheer Jam, made me love Sparkz again.

Moshmallow;

Was fun but a little bit disappointing. Not a lot of people came cause a lot of bands cancelled last minute. Plus there was a core-fest in Ipoh. A hardcore mosher friend of mine told me. :)

So tyeahh, other than that, my boyfriend did good :)

Those were the two main big events i went for. So tyeahh.

My holidays have been interesting. Sorry i havent been blogging.

As u can see, i have been busy.

Tmrw, im going Skating with my girls :D

After that, idk. Supposed to meet my boyfriend but he doesnt seem interested.

LOVES!

Love to me;

2009-12-14T12:57:00.000-08:00

is the words of wisdom from My Dad,
is the love and endless support from My Mom,
is the bravery to go through anything for me from Kak Leya,
is the open-minded, open-hearted chats with Kak Nani,
is the care and affection that isnt showed by Kak Leysha,
is the ammount of changes, emotions and crazy things i go through with Harith N,
is the waking up to her smile when we wanna go out from Jeja,
is the long, painful laughter made by Mell,
is the webcam moments, pep talks, sudden meet-ups with Ziany,
is the understanding and fun i get from Adruce,
is the moments of truths with Vee,
is the funny msn chats, sudden drunk calls from Lee,
is the caring, worried words and nice long chats with Joey,
is the cheer talk on the way to Charm or on the way back from Charm with Sheryll,
is the little sister feeling i get when i hang out with Xenia,
is the easy forgiveness and forgetness of Amad,
is the comfortable feeling when we talk about anything with Brando,
is the sharing and catching up i do once in awhile with Emir,
is the silent walks and funny facials from Tana,
is how i constantly have to stop everyone from making fun of Ariff,
is the painfully honest words of truth from Ali,
is making stupid sex jokes with Luke.

"Love comes in many ways and is shared in many ways.

Some obvious, some absolutely hard to see.

Some come all of a sudden in a surprise.

Some were carved from long lost best-friends.

Some loves are easly clicked, some had to be fought for.

Basicly, love is what keeps us all alive and breathing.

I love love, therefore i will never give up on LOVE."

- Yours Truly -

Psychological or Mental?

2009-12-14T08:00:00.001-08:00

(I just realized im ugly 20% of the time,

pretty 20% of the time

and the other 60% of the time, i dont give two fucks :D)

Some people are getting on my nerves nowaddays.
I have no idea why?
But its easier to wanna punch someone nowaddays.
Like i read a certain someone's blog and felt like comment-ing on a few things.
But being the oh-so-nice me,
I just kept it in :/
I felt like it. I swear! I SWEAR!

Anyways, I just read Alisya's blog. (Lola)
I like reading her blog.
She and her family remind me of my family.
I dont know why but its like i relate to her.
Maybe in my past life, i was her sister or relatively close.
She's an awesome girl with an awesome blog.
I like reading her blog.

Tomorrow is Harith N and I punye One year one month :/
BUUUUT! *car screeches to a holt*
No celebration cause he being a rockstar :(
He has a gig at a prom. Damn sad :(
Sooo, i made plans with my girls to go skate.
Wheeehoo! Dah lama tak gi skating.
I am sad like hell we cant be together.
But then i have a chance to do something i have been wanting to do ;D

Charm All Stars have stop practicing until January 4th.
Then on the 7th is evaluation 0.0"
Damn scaryy!
Just now was the last practice till January :(
Sooo sad!
But atleast i did back-handsprings :D
*claps alone*
Just had a looong nice shower and gonna head to bed.
*GASPS!*
Its only 12.19am and im sleepy! Hehe :D

Wokay, readers!
Will blog about skating tmrw!
Till then, all stars number one!

LOVES!

Shrug us off your shoulder;

2009-12-12T08:46:00.000-08:00

(I just realized how close we are :P)

So, things are getting hectic now.
Cheer Jam is coming soon.
My one year one month.
Next year's team is fuckd :(
I have to get a coach.
I got the routine just need to train -.-"

I hope things are gonna get better :)
I cant wait till next year.

Went shopping with Mama a day back.
Went to Cotton On, my new all-time favourite shop. :D
Like seriously.
If you buy me something from there, you cant go wrong :D
I just love love love LOVE it!

Harith N and i fought but dah okay.
Baybee, im happy we finally got things off our chest.
Im sorry i said mean things.
But, alaa. We always do that :D
So shadap!

I mahu potong rambut saya.
Jeja, Mell, JOM!? :D

Till i actually have something on mind,
We are not who you think we are! <3

LOVES!

Hellogoodbyes :(

2009-12-10T10:10:00.001-08:00

(I just realized how close it is to the end of 2009 :S)

So i was listening to music, chilexing, onlining and it hit me HARD!
Its DECEMBER!
Meaning that 2009 is gonna end soon :(

I know its a fun thing to go through new years but i cant help reminiscing my past :)
Like the friendships loved and lost.
The ex lovers, the forevers.
The fun times, the sad times, the down right i-want-to-die times.
It just seemed so far away.
As if it all happened years ago!
But it happened this year only :/

1995; I could barely walk or talk. (im sure we ALL missed those times :D)
1996; My first birthday.
1997; I turned two and could communicate awsomely >:)
1998; Move to Bsd from Bangsar. (three years old)
1999; Finally got settled in and happy. (four years old)
2000; Tadika :D Made friends and everything. Some i still have as friends.
2001; Had my first crush :D LOOONG STORY! (six years old)
2002; Sekolah Rendah. I made my first bestfriend, Aida Sofia. Weird ey? I STILL know her :D
2003; My first fight. I beat up a boy for dissing my sister. (standard 2)
2004; Became a pengawas and made my second bestfriend, Farah Iman. Later, Nur Resya came along.
2005; Quit being a pengawas and became pengawas pusat sumber. :D I know i was a geek.
2006; Switched schools due to Leysha and made my third betfriends Alia Ameera and Edlyn Enessa. Met jeja too ;D (went to Tokyo and Berlin in the same year)
2007; Seniors of Sekolah Rendah. Got 3a's 2b's *keningkening* (standard 6)
2008; Got hopelessly devoted to Cheerleading. Made 5 friends that i still cherish till now, Aneesa, Liya, Sabr, Amelia and Tasha. Made new friends like Brando Emir Amad and all AND met my all time super hero, Harith N <3

2009;

Lost those five friends, gained two better bestfriends Aishah Melissa and Jelissa Jasmene.
Made it to a year with Harith N.
Lost friends, got them again, gained new ones.
Improved so much in myself and in Cheerleading. (now that i swear)
Went to Melbourne and met awesome people.
Lost Mak (Yasmin Ahmad)
Gained Aza and Asha :D
Made my life so much more worth the living.
And i cant be happier about the decisions i have made in life :)

So, 2010!
I DARE you to be better than this year :)

Jeja and Mell FTW!

2009-12-09T07:15:00.001-08:00

Inside joke :D

So pretty :D

Personality switch :D

We love love. And love loves us <3

Finally Mell tau nak masuk frame -.-"

Lame loser llama, later! :D

We are three different girls, i swear :D

Lidah lidah and Jeja! :D

To lala or not to lala >D

I had a really awesome two days with them :D

Read!

www.yanalovestolove.tumblr.com

Addictions, Friction and Down Right Hallucinations;

2009-12-07T10:51:00.000-08:00

(I just realized my blog is actually read :D)

So today i feel like talking about addictions.
Addiction does not mean to drugs, cigarettes, alcohol or etc.
Addiction means you can barely stand up straight without it.
So, heres my addictions :D

Addiction #1

I am addicted to Cheerleading. Hence the picture above. :D
I started last year but i have to admit, im hooked!
I cant even sleep without imagining a girl doing a really nice front walk or back walk over.
I tell you, HOOKED!
I have youtube, googled, blogged u name it everything about Cheer. I live, eat, smell and BREATHE cheerleading.
When i stand straight, i HAVE to do an Arabasque or a Heel Strech!
If i dont get to cheer for more than a week, i cry!
I would get in gear, walk to padang Safa and just practice jumps, tumbling and/or balances.
I know, imma dweeb -_-"

Addiction #2

DONT LAUGH! But i am addicted to my boyfriend :D
I have no idea why.
If i havent seen him in more than 2 days, i miss him like hell and i'd find any way to meet him :D
Some say its love but it's unhealthy :D
Idk la, he's like my bestfriend, my boyfriend, my soul-mate.
I do NOT function without him :S
Everytime i first wake up, i sms or call him,
When i wanna go out, i have to make sure i know where he's going.
I check his blog after checking mine everytime i go online.
And! I always check my blog first and foremost.
I like giving him things and stuffs.
I know! Im obsessed :D

Addiction #3

Im addicted to Love :)
Hence both my tumblr and blogger.
YanaLOVESherself and YanaLOVEStoLOVE!
HAHA!
I've been in pretty much every kind of relationship you might have been or will ever be in.
BUT! I have NEVER EVER given up on love :D
Love is so many things to me.
Love is so important thing to me.
Not just from a lover but a bestfriend, family or even a stranger who comes up to you and tells you they like something bout you is love to me :)
I believe that you MUST love yourself before loving someone or expecting someone to love you.
Like think about it.
If you cant find a reason to love yourself, why would someone else have a reason?
Point taken? :D

Addiction #4

Music :)
I dont know anyone in the WORLD who does not like music -.-
Music is like the world's first language!
Everyone connects through music!
Like i HAVE to hear music EVERYDAY!
Like imagine life without music. 0_0
I do NOT wanna go into that.
HAHA!
I love ALL types of music.
You name it, i'll like it.

Addiction #5

Movie and/or Tv Series.
I LOVE MOVIES AND TV SERIES!
Like dvds or pirated cds (bad, very bad, i know) anything is fine!
Like i have stayed in my house for 2 months just finish watching One Tree Hill.
The OC was another crazy homestay!
I have actually lost friends because i rather stay at home to watch a nice movie or finish watching my tv series than to go out with them.
HAHA!
I know its bad! But what to do?
Its an addiction!

So i guess thats it :D
This is a weird post -.-
BUT! I would like to read you talking bout ur 5 biggest addictions :D
If you do write about it, please leave me ur Url or watever :D
Okay?
Till i have new addictions, love is my middle name! ;D

LOVES!

Dont take it personal, but everything's personal;

2009-12-03T10:26:00.000-08:00

(I just realized how un-artistic i am compared to my sisters -.-")

So today i had a pretty well-planned day :)

Woke up, got ready, help with the twins,

Xenia picked us up and to Mcds we went.

(there was a uniform measuring meeting)

After that, lepaked jap with the rest then shot off to Akar Karya.

Why? Well.

MY BOYFRIEND WAS JAMMING!

Idk why, call me a groupie or whatever,

But i just LOVE to watch my boyfriend play the drums.

HE SO TERRER! :D
Me loike ;D

Anyways, lepaked at Wonder Milk then went back to BSD.

Then lepaked at Safa and shot off to CHARM!

Whoot!

Practice was okay. Pretty awesome too. :D

That reminds me of evaluation 0.0"

SCARYYY! *nervous laughter*

So now, im at home with my sisters.

We watched Hindi movies bloopers.

HAHA!

Hillarious la Shah Rukh. <3

And imma bathe now! :D

Till the next time, if you like then you should have put a ring on it!

LOVES!

True love is;

2009-12-02T14:15:00.001-08:00

(excepting the one you love for who they trully are.)